A Long, Opinionated, Slightly Snobby Music Post

First off, let me introduce a new link to the CBK family: Scarlet. You have her to thank for this post. She's a classical clarinet-ist who loves, loves, LOVES music, and we share a fondness for some of the same artists. If you like her site, there's a whole lot more to explore about her in her links (including pics she took at several Hey Mercedes shows). Anyway, we traded some emails, and she listed some of the bands she's into right now and I spent the morning listening to them and other bands on iTunes (thanks for going out of town, Boss!). Sadly, this investigation into music didn't result in any bands that I now love (sorry, Scarlet), but it has led me to the depressing conclusion that I'm just not that into the most hip, popular music these days.

First, I'm going to categorize today's hot music. I should note that this does not include Top 40, Hip Hop, Rap, or R&B. I'm talking indie/alternative stuff exclusively.

Category 1 - Emo/Punk Pop
Category 2 - Weird/Moody Stuff
Category 3 - Neo Concept/Art/Prog Rock
Category 4 - 80's Retro
Category 5 - Solo Sensitive

Category 1 probably has the most bands in it, and is the most varied in quality. It's also kind of on the outs, and treading dangerously in the Top 40/TRL territory. This category used to be the cutting edge back in the mid-late 90s until Blink 182 broke big. Then new bands either became Blink knockoffs (i.e. Sum 41) or dark anti-Blinks (i.e. Taking Back Sunday). Despite the flaws of many of its members, this category includes some of my favorite music/bands: Hey Mercedes, Motion City Soundtrack, Jimmy Eat World, and Braid.

Category 2 was "it" for the past two years, and is still hanging tough. Death Cab for Cutie is the current poster child of this category, having taken over for Modest Mouse thanks to Seth from The O.C. I was first introduced to this type of music in 2002, when a friend recommended I listen to Modest Mouse and The Shins. I just didn't get it back then, and frankly don't now, either. I think my problem is that while I like the music, it doesn't make me wish I had written it. Beethoven moves me, but also makes me jealous. Bob Nanna of Hey Mercedes makes me jealous. This stuff just doesn't. For my taste, it suffers from a general lack of energy and over-zealous attempt to be clever or different. That said, I did find some bright spots in my listening to day. Neutral Milk Hotel is interesting, and their song "Holland, 1945" is really good. The Decemberists, which came very highly recommended from Scarlet, also intrigued me, and the song "16 Military Wives" is a very catchy, political song. And The New Pornographers are very enjoyable. I may pick up some of their stuff. But my overall conclusion about this category is this: I heard it in it's early stages when I listened to The Shins' "Oh, Inverted World" and it didn't take. Now that there are a lot of similar bands in the genre that are a lot more popular than The Shins, I find myself gravitating to that original band, and I think I'm going to buy "Oh, Inverted World". "New Slang" and "Girl on the Wing" are awesome songs.

Category 3 - As a closet/recovering 70s Art Rock fan, I'm hugely surprised at the emergence of this category. System of a Down, The Mars Volta, and Coheed and Cambria all have quite a following despite heady, weird, epic song-cycle type music. The one I've liked the most in my limited listening is Coheed and Cambria, but it still doesn't grab me as something I should get into. I listened to a lot of ...And You Will Know Us by the Trail of Dead today, and I place them more in this category than in Category 2. I heard things I liked (particularly the song "Baudelaire") but nothing grabbed me very much, and I thought the singers' voices weren't very good. As someone who immersed himself in Rush and Yes in high school/college and then matured, it's hard to get excited about the revival. I think it's better that I go back and get into King Crimson, who for some reason I never checked out in my Prog phase.

Category 4 is the least interesting in my book. Sure, a lot of the bands are fun and the music is really danceable, but it's Fad Rock to me. I didn't go for The Strokes when they first came out, and no one since has captured my imagination or heart. "Mr. Brightside" is a great pop song, I'm sure Franz Ferdinand are a great bunch of guys, Bloc Party is super-catchy, and Arctic Monkeys are the next big thing, but nothing sticks with me. Interpol is the most interesting to me of any I've heard so far, perhaps because they incorporate weird/moody elements from Category 2.

Category 5 seems to be where the "it" label is headed, although it started with Elliott Smith and people like Ron Sexsmith, Pedro the Lion and Josh Rouse have been carrying the torch for several years. When I lived in Denver in 2002, I was in a small record store that was playing an unknown guy named Rocky Votolato. He's still around and about to make a bigger name for himself I guess, because I just read a review of his new album in Entertainment Weekly. While Bright Eyes' Conor Oberst occupies the spotlight for this genre right now, Sufjan Stevens seems ready to take over the crown soon. This field is loaded, actually: Iron & Wine, Damien Rice, Rogue Wave, and more and more. And that's not even mentioning the women. It's basically lo-fi singer/songwriter folk-pop, so it's a relatively easy-access genre for new artists . It's also been around forever, but is really catching on now, for some reason. While I admire the skill and poetry of a lot of these artists, it just doesn't do it for me. Don't get me wrong, I'm a huge Elliott Smith fan, and love Guster, who flirt with this category. Bob Nanna's The City on Film is half in this category and half in Category 1, and I love it. But that's about it for me here.

Obviously, all the preceeding is my opinion, and probably ill-informed at that. I've tried to do some research, and I pay attention to what's coming out as well as I can. But I welcome any feedback from you guys, be it harsh criticism or pleading suggestions that I give your favorite artist a chance. Let me know what I'm missing, why I'm wrong, or how I'm right on the money.

One conclusion that I can reach from all this analysis is that I've become very lazy and frugal in my old age. I'm sure that given the time I would like a lot of the artists I listened to today, and many more. But I don't have the time, money, or facilities to buy all those CDs and listen to them enough to really appreciate how good they are. With a wife and two kids, a crappy stereo, and a mild TV addiction, I'm just not made to be a true music-phile anymore. The music I've added to my collection in the last few years has grabbed me instantly, or come about because I saw the band in concert and they sold me. If it doesn't move me in one or both of those two ways, I'm passing. I prefer to passionately love a few artists from a particular genre rather than listen to everything in that genre. That's how I roll.

And Scarlet, thanks so much for your suggestions, and I didn't mean to put down your favorites in here. I did like the music, especially Snow Patrol, and I look forward to sharing more with you.

iPod: "25" by Veruca Salt, "Crackerman" by Stone Temple Pilots, "The One I Love" by R.E.M., "Suddenly" by Athenaeum, "Wrath of the Donkey Remix" by .Moneen., "Singing in My Sleep" by Semisonic, "Round Room" by Phish, "My Evaline" by Weezer, "Red Hill Mining Town" by U2, "Come Back" by Foo Fighters, "Always Something There to Remind Me" by Braid, "Cargo of High Hopes" by Fossil, "Show Me" by Soundgarden, "Something's Always Wrong" by Toad the Wet Sprocket, "The Inlaw Josie Wales" by Phish, "Character Zero" by Phish, "Contact" by The Police, "Under Milkwood" by Buffalo Tom, "In Thin Air" by Pearl Jam, "Love for Me" by Guster, "Portland" by The Replacements, "They'll Need a Crane" by They Might Be Giants, "We Are the Normal" by Thanks to Gravity, "Everybody Cares, Everybody Understands" by Elliott Smith

Friday Kid Blogging, and more!

I don't know if any of you have been watching American Idol this season, but there's a contestant on there named Bucky Covington. Here he is in all his Skynard-loving glory.



Anyway, we were watching with The Bear, and when Bucky was introduced to sing, The Bear said:

"I shouldn't say his name."

"What do you mean" we asked.

"Fucky," he replied. "It's a bad word."

This isn't the first time he's dropped the F-Bomb on us. He did it about two years ago. He said it to Lovely Wife's face, not knowing what he was saying. It was all she could do to not laugh. This time, though, he knew what he was saying, so we weren't as amused as last time, but it was still pretty funny.

And before you judge us, he didn't hear it from us. We're pretty sure about that. It's either that Christian private school we send him to, or his delinquent Other Daddy. Hmmm, I wonder which one it is....

Here's a portrait I took of CBK Jr. We were trying to get a picture of him laughing while being tickled, but I thought he looked so cute like this so I snapped it.



More!

Here's an update to the Tear Tracker:

Read this news story and watched accompanying video.
Result:Cried a little. You try and watch it and not get moved, you robots!

And here's a story I feel compelled to share, even though it is Muy Disturbingo. It's safe for work, but not at all safe for your stomach or your sense of moral decency. [shudder]

Have a great weekend, everyone!

How Did That Happen?

1. My site hits got over 20,000 without me noticing. It would take more time than I want to give to find out who was the 20,000th and celebrate that person. Most likely it was someone looking for pictures of Jill Wagner. I'm linked in several forums and on the Ford site as a source for Jill's pics and as evidence of the "craze" Jill's ad campaign has created. These people either failed to notice, or don't care, that I criticized Jill and that she inspired my "Real Beautiful Women" Project to celebrate women who aren't overly-skinny, made-up, and glamorized in the media. Anyway, the Jill Wagner Hounds are still coming to my site in record numbers, and they don't comment. At least do the Daily Brain Squeeze, guys!

2. USA and Canada Men's hockey teams out of the Olympics. Actually, this isn't that hard to figure out. Canada had good goaltending and a STACKED roster, but not enough good chemistry. No line appeared to click like they should have to win games. Don't give me any practice time excuses, because there are other NHL-heavy teams that are playing great together. They generated a lot of shots, and pressure, but not enough good chances, no good odd-man rushes, and their power play just wasn't producing. Glen Murray or certainly Patrick Marleau should have been put on the team just to have a familiar linemate for Joe Thornton. Sure, Jumbo Joe wasn't the centerpiece of the team (that would be the underperforming Jarome Iginla), but having someone who knows how to maximize Joe's playmaking skills would have helped better than having Rick Nash on the team. Maybe not, since Martin St. Louis and Vincent Lecavalier didn't produce much together. What they really needed was a healthy Mario Lemieux to lead them and set up goals on offense. Even at 70-80% he would have made a difference on the team. They played six games at the Olympics, and were shut out in three of them. Wayne, you have a problem, and it's not your wife's gambling addiction.

As for the USA, they probably put together as good a team as they could, except for some hindsight goalie choices. Ryan Miller and Tim Thomas probably would have played better, but there was no way to know that when the team was selected. Too bad Rick Dipietro had an off day yesterday. Even though they're out, all their losses were one-goal losses, so they found a way to score and play tough. With the younger guys from this team (Blake, Drury, Gionta, etc.), a couple future young hot shots, and more solid goaltending, USA should do fine in 2010.

I'm totally rooting for Sweden now, only because I love PJ Axelsson. Even though he gets no love in the NHL, he's always a big part of his national squad and I'm sure his teammates know how valuable he is. Finland is a great story, too, especially playing without Mikka Kiprusoff. Just like in the women's tournament, there's good in teams like USA and Canada losing, because ultimately it makes the sport richer, more interesting, and makes us work harder to get the gold.

Okay, I'll stop the hockey now. Unless the Bruins succeed in getting into the playoffs, that is.

Back to work.

Introducing CBK's "Tear Tracker"

As you might recall, I'm a big crybaby. I went to the second-run discount theater yesterday with my family for a nice holiday outing. The last time I went there I bawled at "Zathura". I was more confident going in this time that wouldn't happen again.

The film: "Yours, Mine and Ours".
The result: Cried.

That brings the Tear Tracker to:

Zathura: Cried.
Brokeback Mountain: Didn't cry.
Yours, Mine and Ours: Cried.
Superbowl Baby Clydesdale commercial: Didn't cry.

Stay tuned for more.

I bow to the cries of the public.

Due to popular demand, and two ridiculous questions I got yesterday, I've removed most of the hockey questions from the Daily Brain Squeeze. Who except Camo Girl knows Chris Osgood's GAA from the 1997-1998 season? C'mon! Not even The Schwab knows that!

The quiz should be heavily laden with TV, music, and movies, with some history and a little hockey mixed in. So please don't run away. The monthly standings are very close!

Ice dancing is weird, BTW. And how cruel is "Dick Button" for a name?

It's over.

Can you tell the difference between these two pictures?



It's the end of a short-lived era. I was pretty weirded out when I saw my face for the first time after the beard was gone. Even going down to the "McGwire" didn't prepare me for what I would look like. It appears my face got fatter while I had a beard, too. Blah!

Vegetable Medley also wants to know what I think of USA hockey. Well, I'll say the obvious about both the Men's and Women's teams: they can't score. They're creating lots of chances, but aren't putting the puck in the net. Sure, there's good goaltending to contend with, but the quality chances aren't there. Jason Blake can't seem to put a shot on net despite several good chances given to him. Erik Cole is playing his heart out, but never gets the puck in front to score. Mike Modano is the #1 playmaker on the team, but the opposing defense is frustrating him too much to get a lot of good chances. Keith Tkachuk and Doug Weight just aren't playing that well, and the defensemen aren't providing much offensive help. Where are younger Brian Leetch and Phil Housley when you need them?

There are some bright spots, though. Brian Rolston, free agent mistake #1 by the Bruins, is having a great tournament, and might be more productive with more dynamic linemates. Too bad he's so valuable on the power play and penalty kill that you can't skate him too much at even strength. Mike Knuble, free agent mistake #2 by the Bruins, is woefully underused. Put him in front of the net instead of Weight and Tkachuk, and you'll see more quality chances and more goals. And Chris Drury, hopefully a future Bruins free agent signing, should also be on the ice a lot more to make things happen. DiPietro's goaltending has been very good. I can't blame him on any of the goals that have gone in, and I expect he'll get the start against Russia.

As for the women, I don't know what happened against the Swedes because I didn't watch the game. I'm bummed that my satellite provider doesn't give MSNBC as part of our package, so I can't watch the Bronze Medal game.

And the sport that I've been most surprised to watch and enjoy: Curling! It's been really cool watching the young Men's and Women's teams from the US. And how much does the US Skip Pete Fenson look like Edward Norton? It's uncanny.



That all for this President's Day. And don't forget that the Brain Squeeze starts up again today!

Blogging means never having to say you're sorry.

But I'm sorry anyway. Work and general apathy have kept me from writing this week. You may have noticed my email address prominently displayed on the site to the right. Feel free to flame me for my writing inactivity.

I want to thank everyone who has been playing the Brain Squeeze! Remember, it's every day from Monday through Friday, and scores accumulate for the month. For those of you who have signed up but haven't played yet, please jump in. Don't let the possibility of hockey questions scare you off. I added several Seinfeld-related categories to the question pool, too!

And in a blatant comment-whoring move, please join me in wishing Lovely Wife a happy birthday today!!!!

iPod: "My Sundown" by Jimmy Eat World.

Friday Kid Blogging

The Bear wanted to have CBK Jr. fall asleep on his chest like we do, so we had them lie on the couch. CBK Jr. was a bit fidgety, so to get him to calm down, The Bear sang him a song that, apparently, he made up as he sang. It went something like this:

It's hard to be a baby turkey
They take your Mommy and Daddy away
They eat your Mommy and Daddy
They take your Mommy and Daddy away

The Bear is also discovering how to use sarcasm. He was holding a deck of Go Fish cards by putting his hand through the elastic band holding the deck together. I asked him if we were going to play Go Fish. He said "No, this is just my hand from now on."

He's a delightful, funny, and sometimes strange kid.

And here's a pic of CBK Jr. playing with one of his favorite toys/snacks.



iPod: "I'm Afraid of Everything (live)" by Braid and "Perfectly" by The Anniversary.

I'm going to get in trouble

I need to get to work, but I thought I'd say hi to y'all and direct you to my new Daily Trivia Game! Just follow the link below every day (except weekends), sign up (it's totally anonymous and easy to do), and match wits with me and all others who play. I set up the quiz to do a broad range of topics that interest me, but I haven't rigged it so I'll win everyday. It's got history, movies, hockey, comic strips, TV shows, Monty Python, music, and more. Come and play. It only takes a little time, and I swear it's fun. So stop being so damn lazy!

CBK's Daily Brain Squeeze

UPDATE: Apparently it doesn't give the same questions to everyone on the same day, so the scoring doesn't mean jack shit! It's still fun anyway. Thanks for playing everyone!

Baahh! Baaahhh! Bah Baahh Baahh Baahh Baahh!

That is an extremely poor, atonal rendition of the opening blares of the Olympics theme. Sorry about that, but I'm very excited about the Winter Olympics beginning today. I'm such an Olympics whore, anyway, but add downhill skiing and hockey to the mix and I gush. Figuratively, of course.

I have a major problem, though. According to this article, the Opening Ceremonies were a cheese-tastic extravaganza! And NBC is showing that tacky-ass brilliance tonight, but I won't be watching. Why not? Because Fox is retiring "Arrested Development" in a wad-shooting, four-episode block tonight. And I am NOT going to miss it. Or at least my DVR won't miss it. I'll be at a birthday party for my father-in-law at a Chuck A Rama buffet. Good times.

Everyone should watch "AD" tonight to send Fox a message that they are evil for giving a great show such an ignoble ending by putting it against one of the most watched events IN THE WORLD. What pricks! I don't really know how the Nielsen ratings system works, and maybe I should be making my plea to households that are tracked for such things, but Dammit, everyone should just watch "Arrested Development" because it's awesome, and to stick it to Fox.

You know what to do, folks.

As for Friday Kid Blogging, I don't have any pictures or movies, just an uncomfortable anecdote. This morning, while getting our 5 year old dressed (I really should give the kid a nickname, shouldn't I? How about "The Bear"?). Okay, while getting The Bear dressed for school, he looked at a copy of Rolling Stone on his floor. I had given him the magazine because it has Jimi Hendrix on the cover. He wanted it because his biological father likes Jimi, and The Bear recognized Jimi from his Other Daddy's Hendrix t-shirt. The Bear asked me if Jimi died young, and I said he did, fearing the inevitable next question: How did Jimi die? He asked that and instead of saying "I don't know" I told him as much as I thought he could handle. I told him that Jimi wasn't feeling well, he went to sleep, threw up while he was asleep, and then choked on it and died. Of course he asked how that happened, and I said Jimi was on his back, so the throw up went into his mouth and then back into his throat. Hey, better than saying he ODed on drugs, right? Lovely Wife was pretty incredulous when The Bear told her how Jimi Hendrix died (since he loves to share new things he learns), and gave me a stern look.

In the car on the way to school, The Bear also told me how one of the Beatles was killed: he walked out of his house and someone shot him with a gun. That one's Other Daddy's fault! I would never tell him the story of John Lennon's assassination. I draw the line somewhere. Parenting is quite the adventure/challenge.

Oh okay, here's a kid related picture. Lovely Wife took it when she noticed how the toys were arranged.



From her perspective, the turtle is mounting Baby Pooh for some hot lovin'. I think it looks more like they're wrestling, and that Lovely Wife has a dirty mind. So you can blame her for corrupting me.

iPod: .Moneen. shuffle. (Yay, they're coming to Salt Lake in April!)

Short TV Post

I'm busy, busy, busy today doing work, trying to make up for my Photoshop vacation earlier this week. So I've just got a few things to say.

"Lost" is awesome, but my DVR didn't record the last couple minutes of the show last night! Anyone know what happened during Sawyer's flashback at the end? I saw Sawyer get in the car, start counting Mississippis, and then walk back in the house. And then it stopped! Aaarrrggghhh!

"Invasion" isn't nearly as awesome as "Lost", but it's very cool and freaky. Last night's ep had a great twist, with some compassion thrown in. And the end was a very good surprise that will set the stage for new things to happen. TOO BAD ABC IS THROWING IT TO THE LIONS WHILE IT DEBUTS A NEW COP SHOW! You bastards! Isn't there any other show you could have put on hiatus while you take an ill-advised dip into CSI waters? Like "Jake in Progress", or something? You better pony up at least the whole season's worth of shows in the spring/summer, even if you don't bring it back next year.

"How I Met Your Mother" may be the funniest new comedy this year, even if it's not the most original ("My Name Is Earl") or daring ("The Office"). Maybe it's a generational thing, but the manufactured zings work so much more naturally than they ever did on "Will and Grace" which was always too clever by two-thirds, even before it descended into the Ninth Level of Guest Star Hell. It's the best successor to "Friends" so far, with young people you actually care about. Plus, you always have to root for Doogie!

CAVEAT 1: "The Office" actually began late last season, so it's not technically new.
CAVEAT 2: "Arrested Development", of shortened season and uncertain future, is the funniest, most original, and most daring of all comedies by far. Sigh.

Back to work. And don't worry, Honey. I'm working on your stuff, too. :-)

iPod: Idlewild shuffle.

Awww Yeah! It's done!

The first prototype, anyway.

Here is the Brogurt container!



[Click for larger version.]

I really should stop here, and then work on making a pic of Ilse holding two of these. That will be tricky, giving her new, out-turned arms. But I'm up to the challenge!

iPod: "Demolition Man" by The Police.

Here's the video!

Here's CBK Jr. rolling over. Also starring the back of Lovely Wife's head and both our voices, in all their goo-gooey glory.



Thanks to Graculus for tipping me about You Tube. Free embedded video hosting rules. I'd prefer it if their player had volume control, but hey, it's free, so I'll shut up.

Look, I'll prove it.

I'm adding another link to my list. The site does not link me, and I don't think it ever will. The blog is called Crazying Up the Bottle, and it's written by Moo Cow. The dude is just plain funny. His readership seems to be quite the inner circle, into which my commenting has squeezed nary a toe. But because I like the site so much, and read it daily, I'm going to link it.

Oh, and if you go there and leave a comment, could you please tell him CBK sent you?*

iPod: "Podunk" by Foo Fighters.

* That was a joke. I'm not that needy.

Meet my Evil Twin

Astute readers may have noticed this subtle, foreshadowy phrase in the previous post:

"If you liked my beard...."

That's right, past tense! While I liked how my beard looked from the front, I saw a picture of myself from the side and it was pretty awful. The sides just didn't grow in enough, so I did this:



Or maybe an Evil Me came through a dimensional door, killed the Good Me, and took over posting on this blog. (Any similarity to Star Trek and/or South Park purely intentional.) If that's the case, it sure was nice of Evil Me to add that link for The Bawdy Cloister. Have you gone there yet? Well get goin'!

I'm not sure I like it that much. I look too much like some of my brothers, who have a long history of sporting the Modern Goatee.* And the maintenance is worse than having no facial hair at all. But Lovely Wife likes it, and my 5 year old son's fears of it making me look like a bad guy didn't come to fruition, so I'll keep it a little while.

And that's the Facial Hair update.

iPod: I'm really spacing out, not hearing it at all while typing. Right now it's "Push Me, Pull Me" by Pearl Jam.

* I'm making up this term since it's not really a goatee, but it's also not really a Van Dyck. Maybe we should just call it the McGwire or the Caminiti.

Weekend in Review and a New Link

I succeeded in being very lazy this weekend. By watching the baby a lot, I was able to fool my wife and get away with avoiding productive work. Didn't keep me from finishing Ilse, of course.

Anyway, I was watching "Finding Nemo" on Saturday, hoping it would calm our little boy better than the "Baby Einstein" DVD that makes him scream, and I seriously cried at about three or four different parts. Jesus H. Christ it was bad. It's all the father/son stuff, I guess. So my wife and I went to see Brokeback Mountain, and I brought a pack of tissues in anticipation of my wimpering meltdown. And then nothing happened. I didn't even come close to crying. I liked the movie a lot, but it never got to me in that way. We both thought the movie could have been more moving, but the emotion was so understated and repressed, it brought nothing out of me. Maybe I just didn't believe the love was conveyed convincingly. The suppressed feelings between Michelle Yeoh and Chow Yun-Fat in "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon" were much more tragic to me, and not just because it was a heterosexual relationship. The gay relationship Ang Lee portrayed in "The Wedding Banquet" was much more intimate and passionate. Perhaps the screenplay was the hindrance.

I really liked the performances, though. Heath Ledger was great. The cosmetic aging of the characters was pretty weak, only Jake Gyllenhaal's was remotely believable. But the camera work and landscape shots were gorgeous. So, still no big cry out of me. I don't know what's going to bring it out. Maybe I should just watch "Miracle" or "Hoosiers" again, or better yet "The Pride of the Yankees" (in which Babe Ruth was played by... Babe Ruth!). It's totally okay for a guy to cry during a sports movie.

About the Super Bowl I have nothing to add to what everyone else is saying: bad officiating, generally boring game, and pretty so-so commercials. I still like the Ameriquest Financial "Don't judge" commercials, but this year's fave award goes to the Ford Escape Hybrid commercial with Kermit the Frog mountain biking, kayaking and rock-climbing. That was awesome! Kermit rules.

As for the new link, I have some explaining to do. It often appears that my links are merely back- scratching for a link already given to me. It's not, but the people I link keep beating me to the punch. I link to sites I enjoy and that I think others should and will like. It is not a cyber tit for tat. In fact, I still have links to people who have REMOVED me! (What's up with that, Peach and Marisa?) Anyway, there are several reasons to visit The Bawdy Cloister, run by The Rowdy Theologian:

1. He's smart and funny, and leaves very good sarcastic comments.
2. His site is humbling. If you think you have a lot of trivial, pop-culture-nostalgia knowledge in your head, wait until you see what he's got going on. We are not worthy.
3. If you liked my beard, you'll like his 4x more. (That's roughly how much thicker than mine his beard is.)
4. He hosts a daily trivia quiz that's really stirred the competitive juices in me. I would probably be in the lead this month had I not forgot to do Sunday's quiz. Dammit! Anyway, you can go up against me, RT and others in obscure trivia every day. So it's got that going for it.
5. Total Burger Chef fixation/obsession.
6. I told you to check it out. So you have to. Now! (Especially you, Bliss. I really think you'll enjoy it.)

So there you have it.

I can't think of a good way to end this post.

iPod: Too busy typing to notice, but "A320" by Foo Fighters is on now.

Now THAT'S a Wench!

Meet Ilse!

Sure the cleavage is a little off-center, but her boobs were too big for the top, and the cleavage didn't quite match up perfectly. But I think with this, and the voting from yesterday, she's finally done. I give you the official BroGurt SpokesWench!

P.S. - I'm searching for pictures of yogurt online, and in the first 25 pages of results in Google Images, not one picture of Mel Brooks in Spaceballs came up! That's disgraceful.

Friday Kid Blogging

I misspoke yesterday when I said my life is boring. I meant that my job is so boring that I spend most of the day Photoshopping busty women into skirts. The rest of my life is great, but it's pretty standard family/parent stuff that hardly makes for the best blog material. That being said, I'm going to continue doing the Friday Kid Blog, because it gives me something to write about on Fridays, and my family is the most important part of my life. At least until the Bruins win the Stanley Cup, then I'm sure they'll understand if I ignore them while I jog from Salt Lake to Boston as a tribute to the long, hard journey it's been for the Bruins and their fans since 1972, the last time they won the Cup. And when I get there, the press coverage of my trek will ensure that the players, coaches and Harry Sinden himself will greet me with autographed jerseys, photo ops, and Andy Moog's complete, game-used goalie equipment from the 1989-1990 season. Then I'll quietly go back to my pleasant family existence.

And for this week's Kid Blog: CBK Jr. finally rolled over by himself! We've been trying to get him to do it with no success. Then the other night I put him down in front of a toy, and he just pushed himself over. I called Lovely Wife in, and he duplicated the feat. I got the video camera and we filmed him doing it two more times. I'm going to try to find a video hosting site that will allow me to post the clip here, for you all to fawn over.

Have a great weekend, and Go Seahawks, because if it can't be the Pats, no AFC team should win, especially the damn Steelers.

iPod: "Dysentery Gary" by Blink 182, "Nocturne" by Rush, "Scents and Subtle Sounds" by Phish, "Under Milkwood" by Buffalo Tom, and "She's an Angel" by They Might Be Giants.

I know I'm obsessed.

But it's so much fun! Here are the candidates for BroGurt SpokesWench:

Green


Purple


Red


[Click for larger images!]

Vote for your favorite. I should get to some actual yogurt container designing this weekend, but I can tell you now it's going to have a big beer stein handle on it. Hence the SpokesWench.

Maybe next week I'll get off this Photoshop kick and write about something else. If there's anything else to write about, that is. My life is boring.

I Rule Adobe Photoshop!

Um, boss, sorry about not doing that work thing you asked me to do.

I wasn't kidding.

I really want lots of people to submit creative manly yogurt container designs. I guess it would help if lots of people read this blog. If you do try, here's a tip: don't use the color pink and/or the word "boyz" or you will be accused of queer-eyeing the project.

And if you're so picture-editingly inclined, why not try to put a more appropriate skirt on the BroGurt SpokesWench pictured below. I'm in the process of trying it myself, but I'm kind of busy at work, and don't know what the hell I'm doing. We'll see how it turns out.

In sporting news, the enigma that is the Boston Bruins went on a three game winning streak recently, and made it to a .500 record. Then they allowed 2 goals in 20 seconds and lost to the Islanders. But then they beat one of the best teams in the league, the Ottawa Senators, in Ottawa! They shut them out, 5-0! Not only was it the Bruins' third straight victory over the Sens, it was the second time this season they've shut them out. The 28 year old minor league veteran goalie Tim Thomas has started like 9 or 10 straight games and is playing great. He's been in the Bruins' system for a number of years, and I don't know why they haven't given him this chance earlier. Now the Bs are back to .500 and only 3 points from the last playoff spot! It will be great if they make the playoffs and salvage what's been a pretty bad season so far.

Lastly, anyone watch the SOTU address last night? Not me, but I watched the Democratic response, which I guess was pretty good. Bush and the Republicans in Washington enrage me, but also exhaust me. I wish that they weren't so damn effective at spinning their failures and misguided policies to the American public, and that there were more effective voices from the Democrat side besides Hillary "Workin' on the Plantation" Clinton. I guess if I really wanted change, I should get off my ass and do more. But I'm a family man and lazy person by nature, so I just say "Blah" to the whole thing and wait for my chance to vote in 2008.

Way to end on a positive note, huh?

iPod: "Wolfman's Brother (live)" by Phish, "Minimum Wage" by They Might Be Giants, "Switch Opens" by Soundgarden, "Twinstar" by Veruca Salt, "Sex Type Thing" by Stone Temple Pilots, and "Just Another Story About Skeeter Thompson" by Foo Fighters.