Monday, December 20, 2004

I asked for it!

Well, I guess I invited the criticism I've received lately. Apparently I'm a chauvinistic, degrading-to-women, sports-obsessed caveman. My wife tells me that maybe my profile picture is a bit off-putting. So I've changed it. No, it's not actually me (why some people do that I'll never understand), but I've been told twice by this woman that I look a lot like this guy. He's Matthew Lillard, famous for being in Freddie Prinze Jr. movies, but a talented actor in his own right. I first saw him in SLC Punk, and loved him. That's where this picture is from. I thought it reflected my insensitive, surly nature. I guess I see the resemblance a bit, but my wife thinks I look like Matthew Broderick. Ironically, my name is not Matthew. BTW, the old picture was Joe Thornton, a hockey player. He's the captain of the Boston Bruins, and is on indefinite hiatus from NHL play, like all NHL players.

I guess I'll stay away from sex for a while. Don't want to alienate my fledgling audience. Don't worry, I'm not caving to prudes, but maybe I can think of more enriching things to talk about than hard core porn during the holiday season. Sports, though, I make no promises about. Did you see the Detroit Lions blow the game yesterday against the Vikings? Amazing. I thought the Vikings had squandered another game, only to be saved by a most unlikely gaffe. The damn Steelers squeaked out another one, those fuckers! They're looking vulnerable, though. The Pats play tonight, and it will be tough to get much viewing in with The Swan Pageant finale on, too. Yes, I know how disgusting this show is and how overtly symptomatic of our horrible, horrible beauty-obsessed culture it is (yawn). It's just cheap, train-wreck entertainment. I've already boycotted the sponsors, don't worry. You see, one of our TV's has passed on, so there'll be no taping of one and watching the other. And that leads me to what is a very disturbing theme this year: We can't stop spending money!!!!!

I feel like the Bush Administration! It all started innocently enough when we decided to get a new bed with our wedding money. We got a king bed, dresser and nightstand. They look gigantic in our small house. Next major purchase was the car, which needs new floor mats and tires. Then there was all the Christmas shopping for others, some eBay shopping for myself, and DSL. And now we need a new TV! Not only do circumstances keep arising that "require" new purchases, but we keep getting the funding to do it!!! We're not being totally irresponsible, though. We're saving for our son's school and future, and for the time when we add to the family. And thankfully no credit is involved (except for the car loan).

Now that is the ultimate holiday season topic: consumerism run amok! Who can find offense in that? That's satire, btw. I myself find rampant spending and materialism somewhat shameful. Sure I've always wanted stuff, but I never really felt good about it, or acted on the impulse with a sense of entitlement. I guess I shouldn't feel guilty about working hard and getting rewarded for it. I'm glad that I can spread some holiday giving to my family and friends on a level that I never have before, and participate in a holiday charity. The spending flu will pass soon, and I can go back to being my modest, dated-wardrobed self. And do more marathon training while I'm at it. I'm sorely behind on my schedule, but I've been sick. (cough, cough)

iPod: "Low Light" by Pearl Jam.