Wednesday, December 15, 2004

Ho Ho Hooooh No!

It's the giving season, CBK fan(s)! Here are some entertaining, heart-warming articles and gift ideas for you all. First up, this guy has a lot of sack, and thank God for it! True, harassing Christina and Justin fans isn't up there with Alaskan King Crab fishing or Mike Tyson baiting on the dangerous activities spectrum, but Adema fans are probably more surly than your average concert-goer. He's my hero until he shows up at a Rush concert. Yes is free game, though. I've outgrown that part of my prog-rock phase.

How cool is this kid? It makes me feel good to hear that teenagers do these things, but also shamefully guilty that I don't do anything close to this level of sacrifice and giving. I'm doing the United Way's Sub For Santa this year, thanks to my selfless wife, but I could do so much more, couldn't I?

Yes I could! Like spreading the word about these! The Japanese are just fucking weird, okay? Nothing against them biologically or genetically, but culturally they're quite fascinating/disturbing. MXC is hilarious, and not just for the risque, dubbed commentary. But if you can find a culture more obsessed with semen, you must tell me. Seriously, I'd like to know about it. If you're in to napping on more explicit throw pillows, then there's these or these. (I'm an equal opportunity shopping advisor.)

Now that I've spread some holiday cheer, it's Grinch time. No, Wayne, there really isn't a Santa Claus. Since Gretzky is on the owner side of the fence these days, I'm sure he doesn't care. I reported my impressed-ness with the NHL Players' offer before, but of course, the owners want cost certainty. Because, surely, self restraint isn't a viable option. Goodbye, season. February through June is going to be a LONG time! In other bad news, the Patriots' O-Coordinator will be stretched pretty damn thin, Pedro's chasing the big (ill advised) money in Queens, and Curt won't be ready for opening day. At least my college's hockey team is doing well.

And what about this? What kind of election can Iraq really have? Even without the violence, can you pull off a legitimate nationwide campaign and election in under two months? I think not! The administration is really forcing the appearance of "Freedom on the March." The Bataan Death March, that is! And how much autonomy will this parliament have? None! Iraq's going to be a puppet state for a long, long time. Just what they wanted, after all! Some people are getting the Christmas they want. Too bad it's not the troops.

iPod: A couple of good ones! "Cyclops Rock" by They Might Be Giants, "Hawthorne" by that dog., and "Circus of the Stars" by Braid.