Why Would I Do Such a Thing?

Like eating 5 Slim Jim's within 10 minutes? It's probably a good thing I'm too congested to taste my food. My stomach will, assuredly, not be amused later this evening.

And yes, Dear, I ate the whole stocking-stuffer package you gave me for Christmas. I was suddenly hungry.

iPod: "Please Drive Faster (live)" by Braid.