Salt licks and Beatniks

Danke schoen

2006-12-03T09:37:00.000-08:00

I promised a Kid Blogging post, so here it is. But this will be my last post. Having my second blogiversary made me think about how I've been keeping the blog on life support the last couple months. Seeing as I can't even get a regular post up once a week, there's really no point to keeping it going. I want to thank everybody who read and participated in this period of my life. It was fun, and I'll continue to enjoy reading your blogs. But I think I've outgrown my own blogging phase.

I will keep the blog up for the quiz link, though. I'll never outgrow my trivia phase! :-)

Thanks again, everyone! And take care.

Here's The Bear losing/extracting his first tooth.

Wow, I totally forgot!

2006-12-01T09:41:00.000-08:00

That last week was my blog's second birthday. I guess I'm so inactive lately that it slipped my mind. Happy birthday, blog!

I have a video for Friday Kid Blogging, but haven't pulled it off my camera yet. I'll try to get it up tonight.

Friday Kid Blogging

2006-11-17T12:11:00.000-08:00

I have a video of CBK Jr., but not of The Bear, so I'll tell a funny Bear story first.

The Bear likes to have a parent lie in bed with him before he goes to sleep. We call it snuggling. When it's my turn I often fart while lying there. I do it for two reasons: 1. it allows me to relieve gas while not around my wife, and 2. it makes The Bear laugh sometimes. Well, it should come as no surprise that The Bear has started to fart in bed with me there, too. One night he let a particularly foul one out, so I got out of bed and told him I would return once the smell dissipated. While I was in the kitchen telling Lovely Wife what had happened, The Bear started calling me into his room. He was rather persistent, and was interrupting me and LW, so I went in to scold him for his rudeness. When I got in the room, I found him on all fours on his bed. As soon as he saw me, he ripped a big, juicy fart while giggling uncontrollably. The little stink bomb had set a trap for me, holding his explosive gas in as long as he could. I was disgusted, for sure, but also pretty impressed.

Here's a video of CBK Jr. playing with his brother's karaoke machine. He REALLY loves music, it's so cute.

Doesn't anyone want to kick ass and make money?

2006-11-16T09:48:00.000-08:00

So I only have one potential taker for my proposed World Series of Pop Culture Blogger Team. I know it's a lot to ask, but think of when you watch the show, and cringe at the questions the contestants get wrong but that you know easily. That money BELONGS to you (and me). Come on, people! If I don't do this, I'm going to have to make a dorky audition tape to get on Show Me the Money! with The Shat. Don't make me do that.

P.S. - But if I do get on SMTM, you know I'm going to yell "I love black people!" instead of the show's catchphrase.

iPod: "Perfect Blue Buildings" by Counting Crows and "Synchronicity II" by The Police.

Oh, it's ON, Bitch!!!

2006-11-14T13:12:00.000-08:00

I finally got a response email from the producers of VH1's World Series of Pop Culture. I may have mentioned this before, but I'd love to make a blogger-based team to get on the show and clean up! I know some of you are pop-culture fiends like me (even more so, I'm sure) and would make great teammates.

There's a slight problem with getting on the show, though. The team needs to go to a casting call in one of 5 cities. After the casting interview (where they presumably pick people based on personality and not sheer knowledge), you get called back to qualify. If you make it to the final 16, then you go to New York for the taping in March. So you see, there will be a significant travel/time commitment to it. But the prize is $250,000 and ultimate bragging rights. Casting calls will be in the following cities on the dates specified:

New York City: January 19th - 21st
Los Angeles: January 26th - 28th
Chicago: February 2nd - 4th
Austin: February 9th - 11th
Orlando: February 16th - 18th

You can only go with an appointment, so the team has to be signed up and invited first. Taping of the actual World Series is from March 22-24.

Since I've just made this information available to all of you, there's nothing stopping you from stealing my idea and running away with it without me. But you wouldn't do that, right? Here's what I propose:

I'll be the team captain,
I've got a great name already, but it's negotiable if someone can come up with a better one,
Express interest only if you really want to do it, and can actually make it to a casting and taping,
If more than two other people want in, then we come up with some kind of quiz to see who gets in (from which I will be exempt, hehe)
If we have 6 or more total people interested, we make 2 teams that sign up for two different castings.

Well, what do you say? I'd like to sign up before the end of November to make sure we get a spot in a casting. Once we have a team we'll have to pick the casting that's most convenient for schedules and travel. Leave a comment or email me if you want in.

Friday Pumpkin Blogging

2006-10-27T12:12:00.000-07:00

We carved some pumpkins for our family Halloween party last weekend.

CBK Jr.'s Pumpkin - We were running out of time before the party, so Lovely Wife just carved a "C".

The Bear's Pumpkin - He actually carved his all by himself! The face started when he accidentally poked the stem of one pumpkin into his, making a star-shaped eye. So we made another eye and he carved the face.

On the other side he just carved some designs. He's so damn cute!

Lovely Wife's Pumpkin - She used a bat pattern, and it turned out pretty cool.

My Pumpkin - I tried to go for a goofy, cross-eyed face this year instead of scary or menacing. I think it looks like a drunk gorilla, though.

The pumpkins are shiny because I sprayed them with WD40 right before I took the pics. Apparently, that helps preserve them after carving.

For much, much better pumpkins, some cool carving techniques, and entertaining commentary, go to this awesome website: Extreme Pumpkins.

And come back next Friday for Halloween costumes!

Friday Kid Blogging

2006-10-20T12:13:00.000-07:00

It's been a little while. Here are some videos.

1. The Bear wanted to dance with CBK Jr. Here are the adorable results.

2. Oh yeah, guess what CBK Jr. can do!

3. He can go the other way, too.

4. He loves books now. In the video he's trying to bark like the doggies. This video kills me.

Real Beautiful Women - North Carolina Edition

2006-10-13T07:59:00.000-07:00

Yes, it's back! For now anyway.

Real Cutie
1

2

Real Hottie - Special Legs Feature
1

2

Real Pretty
1

2

I should have some good stuff for a Friday Kid Blogging next week. See you then.

Monday Trip Blogging

2006-10-09T14:01:00.000-07:00

Day 3 - British Library, Camden Lock, and general walking around

Phone Box near British Library. It was full of Porn flyers.

Canal, locks, and street on Sunday in Camden. Great way to spend a day and money. You may recognize it from a recent American Express commercial starring Kate Winslet.

Piccadilly Circus and Eros Fountain. As you can see, it's no longer a circus.

Take away Fish & Chips.

Battersea Power station, seen through a dirty window on the train to Gatwick. Classic/Pro rock fans will recognize this building from the cover art of Pink Floyd's Animals album. I geeked out when I saw it coming in on the train from Paris, and made sure I got a picture when I saw it again.

So that's it! It was a great, but tiring trip. While in London we saw "Chicago" at a West End theater. It was really good. We saw it mere days before Ashlee Simpson took over the role of Roxie Hart at that theater, so we dodged a bullet there, for sure.

Another thing that I haven't yet mentioned was that Lovely Wife and I had the pleasure of meeting not one, not two, but three bloggers on the trip! We had a long layover in an airport near where The Jinx of Spades lives, so we got together with him and his wife (herself a former blogger) for dinner. We didn't have time or interesting environs to do much but talk, but seeing as we are both married couples with young children about the same ages, we had plenty to talk about. It was a very good way to spend the afternoon before our flight, and I (belatedly) thank Jinx and his wife for making the trip out to meet us.

On our last day in London we had the pleasure of a guide in Graculus, that mischievous rascal of a British blogger. He lives several hours away from the big city, and was recuperating from nasty looking hand surgery, but he made the trip up anyway and introduced us to Camden and his favorite little tea/French pastry shop. He haggled (unsuccessfully) for us at souvenir stands and told us of his rural life. Thank you, too, Grac, for coming up to London and hanging out with us. That brings the number of bloggers I've met to eight, and I have yet to have anything but a wonderful experience.

Things will be pretty slow around here now that I've got the pictures up, but stay tuned for a surprise this week, maybe even tomorrow!

Wednesday Trip Blogging

2006-10-04T09:44:00.000-07:00

Day 7 - London Bus Tour, Buckingham Palace, Tower of London, and St. Paul's

Admiral Nelson column in Trafalgar Square

Big Ben seen through the London Eye. The tour guide told us to take this picture.

Allegedly, the church steeple that inspired the first three-tier wedding cake.

The monument to the devastating fire that destroyed most of London in 1666, cleverly named The Monument.

One of the Tower Bridge's towers, seen from the bus.

Scenes from the changing of the guard at the relatively unremarkable Buckingham Palace.

The Tower of London; actually a fortress with many, not very tall towers.

The infamous Traitor's Gate.

Our Beefeater tour guide. The Crown Jewels are in the building in the background.

Some of the famous Tower Ravens.

Tower Bridge, with the drawbridge raised.

One of the guards with a silly hat who's not allowed to move at all.

The impressive dome of St. Paul's Cathedral.

Only one more day to go. Not sure when I'll get the pics up, though, as I'm traveling to a wedding tomorrow.

Monday Trip Blogging

2006-10-02T15:08:00.000-07:00

Day 6 - London

Shot of Kensington Gardens near our hotel.

Marble Arch, at the northeast corner of Hyde Park.

Old-school British toilets near Marble Arch. Lovely Wife used this bathroom, came out to get the camera, and went back in to take a picture.

Big Ben.

Parliament. (The building is actually called Westminster Palace). We went on a very interesting and informative tour of the building.

The back of Westminster Abbey.

The cloister in Westminster Abbey.

Pirates of the Caribbean exhibit in Madame Tussaud's Wax Museum. (Keira Knightley should raise a stink.)

The impressive and ridiculously expensive London Eye overlooking the Thames.

Westminster Palace, lit up, seen from the Eye.

Friday Trip Blogging

2006-09-29T09:08:00.000-07:00

Day 5 - Louvre, Carnavalet, Picasso, Pompidou Museums and Champs Elysees walk

Winged Victory sculpture. I love this statue. It's really impressive in person.

Venus de Milo's butt crack.

Michelangelo's homoerotic slave sculpture.

Some shots from the Louvre's ancient Egypt section.

Couldn't take pictures in the Carnavalet museum, but it was pretty cool. Lots of French history.

Some examples of Picasso's genius/madness/pranksterism. I still haven't decided which of those three he was more.

The funky fountain outside the Pompidou Modern Art museum. We were tired and not very enthusiastic about the art inside, so we didn't go in.

Obelisk at the Place de la Concorde, site of many beheadings during the French Revolution (but the Obelisk wasn't there yet during the Revolution).

Looking down the line made by the Obelisk, Arc de Triomphe, and La Grande Arche de la Defense.

This was our last day in Paris. I'll start London on Monday.

Wednesday Trip Blogging

2006-09-27T11:44:00.000-07:00

Day 4 - Versailles, museums, and Bateau Mouche

The (partial) palace of Versailles (we couldn't get any good pictures of the whole front)

Inside the Versailles chapel

Big-ass painting of Napoleon's coronation

Fountains and Grand Canal in the palace's back yard

At the Rodin Museum - The Kiss

Rodin Museum - The Thinker

Rodin Museum - The (unfinished) Gates of Hell

Rodin Museum - The Burghers of Calais

The dome of Les Invalides (another of my favorite places in Paris) from the gardens of the Rodin Museum

Napoleon's Tomb (yes, he's really in there)

Coat and hat worn by Napoleon on St. Helena

Mini Statute of Liberty, seen from a boat on the Seine (with Eiffel Tower in the background)

Oops

2006-09-26T17:21:00.000-07:00

Got a bit busy and forgot to do trip pictures today. I'll get back to it tomorrow.

Monday Trip Blogging

2006-09-25T14:34:00.000-07:00

Day 3 - Paris Tourist Traps

Sainte Chapelle from the outside.

Video clip of the stained glass inside Ste. Chapelle.

Saint Michel monument.

Notre Dame cathedral is the shit!

Charlemagne statue in front of N.D.

Couple of chimeras up on N.D.

The only picture we took inside the Musee d'Orsay.

The inconceivably small Smart Car.

The self-cleaning, free public toilet we used near Montmartre.

An illegally-snapped shot of the inside of Sacre Coeur Basilica.

S.C. in all it's glory from the outside.

Our escargot appetizer.

Friday Trip Blogging

2006-09-22T10:48:00.000-07:00

Day 2 - Driving tour of some Loire Valley castles

Our cute little Opel Meriva. Manual transmission, so I got to have some fun driving it.

Nuclear power plant seen on the road to Chambord.

Unfortunately back-lit pic of Chambord castle. It was a hunting lodge for nobility, thus all the chimneys for keeping warm during hunting season.

Looking up the middle of Chambord's famous double-helix staircase, rumored to be designed by Leonardo Da Vinci.

Chenonceau castle, spanning the Cher River.

Impressive fireplace mantel in one of Chenonceau's bedrooms.

The chapel of Amboise castle, overlooking the town.

Amboise castle from the front.

Villandry castle.

Hungry fish in Villandry's moat.

Funky, multi-colored chili peppers in the Villandry gardens.

View over a portion of Villandry's impressive gardens, the real attraction at the castle.

View of Azay-le-Rideau castle from outside the gate. We got there too late to get in. The castle has a cool moat that makes the castle look like it's floating on the water.

Ussé castle, also closed, but we were able to get a good shot from outside. This castle inspired the original Sleeping Beauty story.

I'll pick this up again on Monday. Have a great weekend!

Thursday Trip Blogging

2006-09-21T09:51:00.000-07:00

I've been away for a while, so I won't have any pics of the kids, but I've got plenty of our trip to France and England (don't worry, Grac, I know London doesn't really count as England).

I'm going to stretch this out and just do one day's pics at a time. But don't worry, I'm not going to show every boring photo we took. I'll try to keep them interesting.

Day 1 - Paris
La Tour Eiffel in daylight

Looking up the center of the tower

Palais de Chaillot (with La Defense in the distance) at twilight

L'Arc de Triomphe, one of my favorite sites in Paris, at night

The Arc's impressive coffered ceiling

A video of the Eiffel Tower flashing for the tourists

Friday Kid Blogging

2006-09-01T09:55:00.000-07:00

The Birthday Party!

Friday Kid Blogging

2006-08-25T09:45:00.000-07:00

One year ago today, Lovely Wife experienced some abdominal pain and unusual bleeding at about 7 pm. Trying not to get freaked out, we drove to the hospital to see what was going on. Our baby's due date wasn't for two weeks. She was admitted to the maternity ward and had some tests done. The doctors couldn't say what had caused the bleeding, and suggested inducing labor to make sure the baby would be okay. We didn't want to induce labor, but agreed that if she went through the night without labor starting, then we'd induce in the morning. Labor started in the early hours of August 26. By 7 am, our baby was ready to come out. Realizing that the birth was imminent, I went into the bathroom and put my contacts in to better see the birth of my son. My wife started pushing while I was in there, and people started yelling for me as the baby's head crested. I rushed out and helped Lovely Wife push the rest of the way, and out came our little boy. Tomorrow is his first birthday, and to say his first year went by quickly is an understatement. Part of me just can't, or won't, accept that he's not going to be our adorable little baby boy for ever. He's such a sweet, happy, fun, well-behaved baby that part of me wants him to stay that way. But he won't, and I know that I will cherish each stage and age that comes for the amazement and amusement he will provide us.

Happy Birthday, CBK Jr.!*

*Yes, I'm crying right now, just a little bit.

Why Do I Even Bother?

2006-08-20T23:51:00.000-07:00

With watching and caring about the Red Sox? The worst part is coming to the realization that the Great Comeback against the Yankees and World Series title were just flukes, not some monumental, curse-breaking effort signaling a new era in Red Sox history and fulfilling some cosmic destiny that the Good Guys were finally going to be on top. The Red Sox are just the 1997 Florida Marlins. They spent some dough, got some good guys on the team, won a championship, and then saw many of the key players go elsewhere. Maybe they'll win another like the Marlins did, but probably not. The Red Sox are famous for not winning, and that's what they'll keep doing. But at least we have the memory of that one year, when for some reason they were able to win it.

Thank God football and hockey seasons are almost here. It will be better when the Red Sox don't make the playoffs and I can focus on those other sports and not waste my time and hopes on the BoSox.

Friday Kid Blogging

2006-08-18T09:11:00.000-07:00

Sorry, don't have any new content for this today. So I'm being punny.

I also want to shout out to the best post from The Dialog Blog I've seen in a while:

"You didn't have to black out and piss yourself. It wasn't like some adventure. It's just poker."
"I know, sorry."

iPod: "Your Redneck Past" by Ben Folds Five, "Are You Experienced?" by Belly, "Mission" by Rush, and "All the Way Up to Heaven" by Guster.

Sweet!!!

2006-08-16T21:27:00.000-07:00

Benji! Benji! Benji! Benji!

Yes, I got sucked into "So You Think You Can Dance" this summer. Sue me.

Benji! Benji! Benji! Benji!

Don't let your proximity to Celine Dion break your spirit, Benji.

R.I.P. Bruno Kirby

2006-08-16T12:46:00.000-07:00

How weird is it that I extolled the virtues of Bruno Kirby just two weeks ago, and now he's dead? I didn't even know he had leukemia, and apparently he hadn't been diagnosed too long ago. He will certainly be missed in the movie world. He was a hard-working actor you recognize easily, but who was not a "celebrity" who thrust himself in the limelight, ad nauseum. He also often had a killer 'stache and a pretty bitchin' real name: Bruno Giovanni Quidaciolu.

Here he is with Billy Crystal in "When Harry Met Sally".

iPod: "Niagara" by Braid.

Friday Kid Blogging

2006-08-11T12:50:00.000-07:00

Didn't have anything prepared for this week, so we just put CBK Jr. in some silly scenarios and took pictures. Enjoy!

Tool Boy

Driving His Box Car

Tumble Dry, Low Heat Only

iPod: "Low" by Foo Fighters, and "You Saw A Light" by Guster .

I thought they stopped this shit two years ago!

2006-08-10T10:26:00.000-07:00

The Red Sox, I mean. They're having another August Meltdown, giving away the AL East and AL Wildcard. And of course, it's relief pitching's fault. Damn bums! Still plenty of time to right the ship and win the division, but the Damn Yankees are playing better now, the Twins are on fire, and the White Sox are a very good team. Still plenty of time to fuck it up and drop to third in the division, too.

Hey, at least football and hockey seasons are around the corner, and things are looking good for the most part. Ohio State Buckeye: ranked #1 in the pre-season coaches poll, Baby! Boston Bruins: roster overhaul with some very promising players and a new coach! Dave Lewis of Detroit Redwings fame. (How do you feel about that one, Camogirl?). Patriots: that's more of a question mark. Big losses in receivers and, of course, Adam Vinatieri. Also, they're not as deep at linebacker as they have been the last few years. The secondary, the offensive line, running back, a whole lot of uncertainty, but if injuries are low and people perform like they can, it should be a great season. I'm getting psyched.

By the way, anybody see this story? Not the most comforting thing to read while preparing for a trip to France and England next month, at the end of which we'll be flying from London to Newark. Hopefully it will all be smoothed out by then.

Also by the way, I'm curious how many of you clicked on the link to my friend Daisy's "boobs" a couple posts back. I expected more comments about, but I guess you either didn't notice the link or you were to embarrassed to admit you clicked it. C'mon, fess up! There's little to no shame. ;-)

Lastly, about my tease of ending the blog, I'm still considering it. I'll probably just post a lot more rarely, doing Friday Kid Blogging and a random "Hey there" post. Plus, I need to keep the link to the Brain Squeeze up. Can't end that! We'll see, I guess. Thanks so much for all your nice comments about the blog, though. "You really like me!"

iPod: "Spangle" by Jimmy Eat World, "Getting Even" by Guster, "Kickstand" by Soundgarden, "Broon's Bane (live) by Rush, and "Waltz #1" by Elliott Smith.

Playing Catch-Up in Pictures

2006-08-07T23:05:00.000-07:00

Sorry for the recent silence. I was traveling last week and am still pretty busy. Here are the photo highlights of the last week or so (warning: pics are of varying quality):

While in Calgary I dined with the Incomparable JuicyA and her esteemed hockey-phile boyfriend Jer. We ate barbecue at a place called Bookers, and it was GOOOOOOD. We got the Meaty Platter, which is a bunch of ribs and chicken with corn, muffins, coleslaw and jambalaya served on a garbage can lid.

We also had a bucket in which to throw the bones.

We talked about much more than hockey, and it was a good time. But I will say this: have you ever wondered why some people can be so annoying and gabby sometimes, and then notice yourself being annoying and gabby? I'm not sure Jer liked me all that much, and I don't blame him. Sometimes I get on a roll and don't realize how trying I can be in conversation. But don't let that discourage you from meeting me. It's not a regular thing (I hope).

On Friday night the family and I went camping. It was the first time we went by ourselves, not with extended family members who know more about camping. Here is the tent we struggled to put up:

In our defense, the instructions were just plain wrong. That doesn't explain our inadequate supply of firewood, or difficulty starting and maintaining a fire, or my inability to light a gas lantern. We got dinner and S'mores cooked, though, so all was well... until we went to bed. We were up in the mountains in a nice quiet spot. However, there were some houses up on a hillside not too far away and one of the houses hosted a VERY LOUD techno rave from about midnight to 4:30. Damn, it was loud, and kept LW and I awake most of the night. We found the local sheriff's number at the restrooms and called at about 4. They had already received a call and had some officers en route, and finally at about 4:30 the incessant beats and beeps stopped. It was very surreal. The music was echoing over the canyon and sounded like it was coming from the next campsite over. Needless to say, we woke up the next morning not feeling very refreshed and rejuvenated.

Mother Nature rewarded our suffering, though, with a visit from this nice moose right by our campsite:

If some other campers hadn't called over to tell us he was coming, he would have just burst through the bushes and scared the crap out of us. But he was a nice moose and was just snacking on some leaves. Lots of other campers came to our site to have a look. We were famous.

And on Sunday, I went to good ol' Walmart to buy some boxer shorts and saw this from the parking lot before I went in:

It was actually a lot more vivid, but the camera didn't capture that.

Once inside I stumbled upon this VERY disturbing product in the "Not That There's Anything Wrong With That" section:

Seriously, a string version?!?! That's just wrong. Wrong, wrong, wrong!

Lastly, my lack of frequent and/or interesting content over the past few weeks has been atrociously apparent, I'm afraid, and it's led me to a kind of blogging existential crisis. Do I really have it in me to keep doing this? I'm not sure, but I'm not making a decision about it right now. If you want to beg me to keep writing, feel free to do so in the comments, but I don't suspect that such pleas will have that much bearing on my which way I go. They will only be smooth, pleasurable strokes to my ego, which obviously have their own intrinsic value.

My Friend Daisy

2006-08-02T21:31:00.000-07:00

There are a lot of reasons to like my friend Daisy:

1. She's cute and funny and brash.
2. She was a great friend to me during the summer when my first marriage was ending.
3. She's not above pulling the stalkerish drive by, even when she's in someone else's car.
4. She gave me two "professional" writing assignments, and paid me for them!
5. She flashed her boobs at me while on a sidewalk along a busy street in Denver.

I could go on, but the latest reason my friend Daisy rocks is she bought The Time Traveler's Wife for Lovely Wife and me. I just finished it, and really, it is one of the best stories I've read. It's not perfect, and it's not like I've read a whole lot of books, but what a lovely, funny, inventive, and heartbreaking book this is! I can't wait for Lovely Wife to read it, and I recommend it to all of you. I'm sure some of you won't like it that much, and that's fine, but I think everyone should give it a chance. It starts with an outrageous premise, and follows a less than linear narrative, but it totally swept me up in the characters' lives.

So, does anyone have any good books to recommend to me?

Scaredy Cat

2006-07-31T19:47:00.000-07:00

I'll get to the title in a moment, but right now I'm in my hotel room in Calgary watching The Freshman, which is a really funny movie. It's been a long time since I've seen it. I used to think Bruno Kirby was irritating, but he's actually a great character actor.

This weekend Lovely Wife and I went to Utah Olympic Park near Park City to do their Xtreme Zip Line. I was nervous because I don't like fast, downward ride type things. The ride goes down next to the Olympic Ski Jump hill, which is ridiculously large and steep in person. I'm even more incredulous about what those athletes do seeing the facility up close. We watched people come down the zipline from the bottom, and it didn't look like it went that fast. As we went up the chair lift, the line got steeper and steeper. LW asked me several times if I was still a "go". I said I'd be fine. It wouldn't kill me. Looking down from the top I was getting really nervous. I wanted to take a few minutes to psych myself up, but LW went right up to the harnesses, so I followed. Getting into the harness, there was a door right in front of me blocking my view, and I was about to chicken out. The girl working the zipline and LW talked me out of it, though, and I strapped in. I closed my eyes before the door opened, and kept them closed for the first few seconds. The horrible, gritting my teeth, "Oh My God, I'm Gonna Die!" feeling didn't last very long, so I opened my eyes and enjoyed the ride. I'd do it again, and keep my eyes open. I'd like to get over my crippling fear of such things.

After the zipline we decided to try the alpine slide. The Bear went on a field trip to Utah Olympic Park for a summer camp and did it, so we thought we'd try it, too. We waited in line for a long time, and finally got onto our sleds and waited in the queue. The slide is different than others I've seen. The slide part is made of metal, not concrete. When I started off, I wasn't going very fast. I stopped, in fact, so I had to grab the side of the slide and pull myself down. This is under the hot Utah sun, in 95+ degree weather in the mountains. It was freakin' hot. I got going soon, though, so it was good... until I reached the halfway point of the slide and stopped again. I pulled myself down almost all the rest of the way down, alternating hands to preserve my skin. Finally, two teenage girls behind me caught up and pushed me the rest of the way down. My hands were burned, blistered, and gray from the metal. The people working near the slide didn't care much, but at the main desk of the park they refunded our money and offered me the services of an EMT. It wasn't that bad, so I just put my hands in the ice in our cooler. I took some pictures of my blisters and a round quasi-brand I got from a rivet, but I don't have them to post right now.

So the moral of the story is: I may be scared of fast, high rides, but I'm tough enough to sear my hands and suck it up.

Sorry if this post is rambling, but I'm watching TV. NBC's Star Tomorrow is dumb. It seems more like a PR piece for David Foster's ego than a legitimate talent contest. I promise my next post will be more coherent.

Friday Kid Blogging

2006-07-28T18:13:00.000-07:00

What happens when you give your baby boy a wooden spoon and a metal baking pan and let him loose? Watch and find out!

Sorry this is late. I got pretty busy at work today, and went to see a movie tonight.

Nooo! It can't be!!!

2006-07-26T12:07:00.000-07:00

Lance Bass is GAY!!!!!

The lead headline, above the trouble negotiating a cease-fire in Lebanon. What a world!

iPod: "In Your Honor" by Foo Fighters.

Someone Said Your Name

2006-07-26T08:38:00.000-07:00

I've become so lazy and uninspired I've turned to the "use a song title as post title" tactic. Unless I can think of something interesting to say, and a correspondingly interesting title, I'll do the song thing, probably what ever's on the ol' iPod. Right now it's a song by Thanks to Gravity.

Here in Utah we get two July day-off holidays: July 4th and July 24th, also known as Pioneer Day. It commemorates when the Mormon pioneers trudged over the Wasatch Front, put down their handcarts and declared the Salt Lake Valley their Zion in the wilderness. They do fireworks and a parade just like July 4th. The Family and I always go to a cool fireworks show in a town north of us called Bountiful, and we do the parade on Monday morning. The holiday doesn't mean much to me, having only been in the state for almost 4 years, but I like the day off part. It's also kind of interesting to think of the journey the Mormons had crossing the plains and mountains. That must have been pretty hard. So that's the kind of stuff I did on my long weekend.

Not much is exciting me lately. I'm a slave to summer TV, now that the networks have wised up and put entertaining things on. Despite the original casting fiasco, I'm still watching Last Comic Standing. The voting public is getting things right, it appears. We also watch Hell's Kitchen, Treasure Hunters, So You Think You Can Dance, and Master of Champions. We tried to give America Has Talent a chance, but it was ridiculously stupid. The format and judges on Master of Champions aren't much better, but the acts are pretty cool. And of course, I'm watching The World Series of Pop Culture. I've been meaning to email them to try and get on the next edition of the show, and maybe I'll actually do it today. As for my blogger-themed team, several have expressed interest. We'll have to come up with some kind of try-out to see who gets on the team. I've already got a kick-ass name, which I'm not going to reveal for fear of it being stolen.

Work is boring, I haven't been studying for a test I'm planning on taking this Fall, no sports events are worth following until August. All I'm really excited about is the trip to Europe Lovely Wife and I are taking in September. It will be our honeymoon, which we haven't been able to take yet (we'll have our second anniversary this October). We're going to Paris and London. I've been to Paris several times, and London once. LW hasn't ever been to either. We're both excited doing the planning. Right now I'm trying to work out a day trip to see some Loire Valley castles. We'll rent a car and drive out to them. That idea kind of freaks out LW, but it really excites me. Most of the drive will be on the French Autoroutes, so it won't be that tough or scary.

So that's my catch-up spew for now. Hopefully there'll be something else to talk about in subsequent days. In the mean time, I recommend you all go to MTV2.com and go to the page for their Subterranean show. Scroll through the videos they have on that show's page and watch "Sugarcube" by Yo La Tengo. I'd link it, put I'm too lazy right now. Don't worry, it will be worth the effort of finding it.

Have a great day, everyone!

iPod: "Softer" by Jimmy Eat World, "Frame and Canvas (live) by Braid, "Now I'm Exhausted" by Braid, "For Holly" by The City on Film, "Twenty-Points' by Buffalo Tom, "Love/Hate" by Liz Phair, "Hart Crane" by The Anniversary.

Friday Kid Blogging - More Florida

2006-07-21T13:27:00.000-07:00

You're all in for a special treat this week, because not only do you get to see the kids, but you also get fleeting glimpses of me and Lovely Wife! The video quality took a sharp dive after I uploaded these vids, so don't get too excited.

1. Awesome boogie board run

2. Laughter

iPod: "Scents and Subtle Sounds" by Phish.

Still trying to get into the blog groove

2006-07-20T09:53:00.000-07:00

Here are a couple shots from my trip to Cincinnati this weekend for the funeral:

1. At the Irish Wake we had, there was a buffet dinner. Look what one of the side dishes was!

2. While in Cincinnati I HAD to eat at the famous Skyline Chili before I left, and I got a small 3-Way and Cheese Coney Cheddar Mett, which is the Cheese Coney, but with a cheese-filled hot dog. They also give you Oyster crackers and a bottle of hot sauce at the table. You can crack a small hole in the top of a cracker and put some hot sauce in it to make a Torpedo. I put too much hot sauce in my first one and was crying. Their hot sauce is pretty potent.

And after Skyline, a stop at the delicious and famous Graeter's Ice Cream. Cinci is a goooood eating city! But not a good weight management city.

Back from Cinci

2006-07-19T12:40:00.000-07:00

The gathering of my family to remember and celebrate my grandfather was a very solemn, touching, and wonderful occasion. There were lots of us there: 25 out of 27 grandchildren and 7 out of 17 great-grandchildren. Add in spouses and we were quite the mob. I felt guilty because it had been 14 years since I had seen my grandfather or grandmother, and I was very glad I went back for this. Some of you have asked in the comments about my grandfather's legacy. So at the risk of giving too much information, here's a synopsis:

He was a star athlete in college who went on to med school. After his internship he enlisted in the Navy during WWII. He was a diver and medical officer for an underwater demolition team, which was the precursor to the Navy SEALS. He received the Silver Star for his service, as well as a Purple Heart. About eight years ago he and his team were awarded Green Berets and the SEALS insignia for their role in units that became the U.S. Special Forces. He also served in the Office of Strategic Services, or OSS, which later became the CIA. His service in the nascent OSS was classified and he even kept it secret to his family. After the war he returned to medicine and raised nine children with his wife. They put all their kids through college without borrowing any money. His frugality was legendary, but he was also incredibly generous toward charities, and he even traveled to several countries to donate his services as a doctor. He and my grandmother were married for 64 years.

I wish I had known him better, but my family moved away from Ohio when I was 2. I can count on one hand the times I remember seeing him. Over the last 14 years I didn't have money or time to travel to the family reunions, but now I wish that I hadn't relied on those excuses and gone to one or two. I'm looking forward to the next one so that I can bring Lovely Wife and the boys and introduce them to everyone.

Thanks for your wishes and comments about my grandfather. I'll return to regular blogging activities tomorrow, probably.

Friday Grandpa Blogging

2006-07-14T14:34:00.000-07:00

I didn't have anything prepared for Friday Kid Blogging today, plus I've been a bit busy in the office.

I found out yesterday that my grandfather, my mom's dad, died at 93. He was father to 9 children, and to more grandchildren and great-grandchildren than I can count. He was a doctor and a WWII veteran from the Navy. He served in the South Pacific as an underwater demolitionist, and apparently was also briefly part of a unit that became the OSS (which became the CIA). I'm hoping to learn a lot more about his military service this weekend when I travel to the funeral. He was, by all accounts, a great man who lived a long and full life. I met him several times, but never really got to know him. My family was always more distant from them (both literally and figuratively) than the rest of my mom's siblings.

The large throng of his progeny that congregates this weekend will celebrate his life and legacy proudly.

Yawn.

2006-07-13T10:50:00.000-07:00

I'm so uninspired. Try this site for some amusement: Dictionaraoke (found on some blog after following a link in some comments, sorry it's not a real attribution). Another example of what happens when you combine boredom, genius, and a high-speed internet connection. Why aren't these people curing cancer or resolving conflicts in the Middle East? Oh well, I guess laughter is important, too.

iPod: "Pantomime (live)" by Guster and "It's Been a Blast" by Hey Mercedes.

Awww yeeeahhhh!!!

2006-07-11T11:51:00.000-07:00

I am in love with VH1's World Series of Pop Culture (co-sponsored by Entertainment Weekly, my glossy-paged drug). So who wants to join me on a team the next time they do this? There are several of you on my links who I know could kick ass on this show. Unfortunately, it seems teams have to audition, so not only do you have to have knowledge, but exhibit some flair, as well (at least 7 pieces, I'm sure). We could totally play the blog angle for the team name, though, and come up with a look that will help us get on and win the cash. You'd need some time off from work and money to travel though, too. But think of the everlasting glory of winning this sum'bitch.

Who's with me?

Eine Kleine Weekend Recap

2006-07-10T08:42:00.000-07:00

World Cup-

What the hell was Zinedine Zidane smoking when he head-butted the Italian player?!?! Materazzi must have whipped out a monster racial/yo momma/"smelt of elderberries" insult for Zizou to lose his cool that late in such a big game. I don't think that lost the game for France (subbing Trezeguet in for Henry did that) but what an awful way for one of the world's greats to close out his otherwise illustrious international career. The Italians totally didn't deserve to win, but I can't say that the French were robbed. They didn't score enough, simple as that. I have soccer fever really bad now. I want to play but can't find any outlet for it.

UPDATE: Thank god for the Internet, where people have nothing better to do than make funny shit for our amusement. What a medium! Here are some links to altered pics of Zizou's disgraceful act (Via Thighs Wide Shut, one of the funniest and weirdest blogs you'll ever find. I'm going to add it to my links, I think.)

Link 1
Link 2

Indigo Girls concert-

It was good. The Red Butte Garden is a great place to see a show in the summer. It's smaller then the usual outdoor concert venue, and they let you bring in all the food and alcohol you want. All the hip (and hippy) Salt Lake Lefties come out of the woodwork for these shows and it reminds me of other, less conservative places I've lived. It's very comfortable. There were also a lot more Lipstick Lesbians there than I expected. The show was good. They opened with "Closer to Fine" and closed the encore with "Galileo" and played a mix of old and new in between. They even played "Chickenman", which I was happy about. I took some pictures at the show with my camera phone for you all.

1. As if you needed any more evidence of how awesome Lovely Wife is, she pointed out this prominent whale tail right in front of us. She also helped me time the shot to get it in all its glory:

2. This was one of the mulletiest mullets I've seen in a long time.

Oh yeah, it's on a woman.

3. Another perk of the venue, seeing the full moon peek over the mountains behind the stage. I know it looks like the sun, but throw me a frickin' bone, okay?

iPod: "Hold Me Down" by Motion City Soundtrack, "Milwaukee Sky Rocket (live)" by Braid, "Playing Your Song" by Hey Mercedes, "Again I Go Unnoticed" by Dashboard Confessional, "What Would I Say to You Now?" by Jimmy Eat World, "Authority Song" by Jimmy Eat World, and "Knowing When to Stop" by Hey Mercedes.

Friday Kid Blogging and Other Pictures

2006-07-07T14:31:00.000-07:00

Here are some of CBK Jr. enjoying the beach for the first time:

Here's The Bear after a successful boogie board run:

And here he is getting water thrown on him by Lovely Wife. This is a re-creation of a picture they did almost 4 years ago:

Here are some closeup shots of my second sunburn:

The light covered splotch you see on the right is where the cheap-ass spray-on sunscreen ran down my back instead of covering more of my shoulder.

And here's a big, freaky spider we found in our house. It's too bad I didn't have something in the picture for perspective, like a softball. Fucker was huge!

Lovely Wife and I will be conducting a census of all the lesbians in Salt Lake City this Sunday: we're going to see the Indigo Girls perform. Should be a good show, although I haven't heard any of their albums since Shaming of the Sun.

Also, Go France! "Allons enfants de la paté fois gras!" Beat those Italian pussies! Although how Italy ended the game against Germany was pretty impressive.

iPod: "Don't Ever Tell Locke What He Can't Do" by .Moneen., "Feeling the Time Pass By" by This Is Me Smiling, "No Better Way to Show You Care than a Set of Broken Legs" by .Moneen., "Matter to Matter" by This Is Me Smiling (what the hell is going on?), "Bleed American" by Jimmy Eat World, and "Nothingwrong" by Jimmy Eat World (weird pairs day, I guess).

Back from America's Taint!

2006-07-06T09:30:00.000-07:00

I'm back. We had kind of a rough travel day yesterday, and didn't get home until about 1:30 am. But the trip was great. I got sunburned on the first and last days on the beach (I'm REALLY itchy today), did some boogie-boarding, and ate a lot. Somehow, I only gained one pound over the week (not counting the 3-4 I had gained before I left). I managed two 4-mile runs while there, too. Let me tell you, running at any time of the day in Florida, in 130% humidity, just farging sucks!

I'll get back into the blogging swing soon, but I've got some work to catch up on (on which I've got to catch up?) I hope that you all didn't write your funniest, most insightful, or most heart-warming posts over the last couple days because I probably won't read them. Sorry. I've got too much to read on The Lost Experience.

Thanks for your good vacation wishes, too.

iPod: "Astray, Astray" by The City on Film.

I Believe It's Time for Me to Fly!

2006-06-27T22:28:00.000-07:00

Sorry, guys. I've been busy at work the last two days finishing things up before my vacation. I leave early tomorrow (today if you're reading this on Wednesday) and need to get to bed to squeeze in 4 hours of sleep.

I'll be in F-L-A for a week, and will try to post from there. I'm also going to try my damnedest to play my quiz, but if I don't, it'll be a golden opportunity for some of you to catch up on points! ;-)

Until I can write something more, here's a question: what cheesy band sang the title to this post?

Friday Kid Blogging

2006-06-23T11:46:00.000-07:00

He's crawling! CBK Jr. is crawling, and the terror has begun. He makes a B-line for the dog food whenever he can see it, and zips away to grab something he shouldn't whenever Lovely Wife turns her back for a second. Under my supervision he grabbed the dog's water dish and poured water all over himself and the floor. Obviously, I need some practice.

LW got some video of some of his earliest crawling, but I haven't uploaded it, and it also only shows him from behind. I'll get something up soon.

Today, though, the focus is on The Bear and his last soccer game (which was a couple weeks ago). Here he is breaking away from the pack and scoring one of his goals. Keep your eye on the redhead in the back.

You can see his teammates standing around, but he never stops moving. When we were watching the last US World Cup game he said, "Come on! They're not even trying!" because they weren't running around everywhere like he does. We had to explain that it's a big field, and people play in certain positions so they don't have to run all the time.

I'm also going to give the answer to the last remaining movie quotes here:

4. Why are you shaking me off?
I want to give him the heat and announce my presence with authority.
and
Strikeouts are boring. Besides that, they're fascist. These are from "Bull Durham". E McPan correctly "deductivized" the answer.

6. Well you got it all wrong. Muddy Waters invented 'lectricity. This one's from "Crossroads" starring Ralph Macchio as a virtuoso guitar player. It's NOT the Britney Spears film vehicle of the same name (which was apparently written by the creator of "Grey's Anatomy"). I love this movie! It's been years since I've seen it. Must rent it soon.

iPod: "Guyute" by Phish, "So. Central Rain" by R.E.M., "In Between" by Josh Rouse, "Mistake Pageant" by Idlewild, and "Seether" by Veruca Salt.

Bummer!

2006-06-22T09:35:00.000-07:00

I just stayed home to watch the US soccer team lose to Ghana. Yeah, they were victimized by more bad officiating, but they didn't play well enough to win. The goal they scored was awesome, and they had some more chances, but it wasn't enough. And what the hell was wrong with Landon Donovan? Shoot the ball sometimes, Lan! Sheesh!

Well, I guess I'm rooting for England now, and it would be cool to see Ghana continue to do well. Another four year wait for the US.

iPod: "Spider in my Room" by Barenaked Ladies (weird song).

Movie Quote Meme

2006-06-21T13:12:00.000-07:00

I'm at a total loss for content, and saw this done over at The Bawdy Cloister and The Neutral Zone Trap, and thought it was pretty cool. Here are the instructions:

A. Pick 11 of your favorite movies.
B. Then pick one of your favorite quotes from each movie.
C. Post the quotes on your blog.
D. Have commenters guess what the movie is.
E. Either strike out the quote once it has been correctly identified or place the guesser’s user name directly after the quote.
F. Extra points for knowing the actor or character’s name (or other distinguishing characteristics)

The following are some of my favorite quotes, but not necessarily from my favorite movies. I realized that my favorite movies don't have super funny or memorable quotes. But there are a bunch of silly/cheesy movies that do! Good luck, and make sure you check out RT's and McPan's entries, as there are plenty left to get.

1. Why can't you say you like my hat? Why can't you say you like my suit? I've earned it! From "Far and Away", answered correctly by Lulu (and known by Vegetable Medley).

2. I am an FBI agent! From "Point Break", answered correctly by Lulu (and known by Vegetable Medley).

3. My God! Suicide? Why?
Does this answer your question? From "Heathers", answered correctly by Lulu.

4. Why are you shaking me off?
I want to give him the heat and announce my presence with authority. I thought that people would get this one quickly. Here's another from the same film:

Strikeouts are boring. Besides that, they're fascist.

5. Let's just take a step back. No, I was wrong. I'm sorry, take a step forward. Now, take a step back. Step forward. Back. And then we're cha-cha-ing! From "Real Genius", correctly answered by Bliss (and apparently known by Vegetable Medley).

6. Well you got it all wrong. Muddy Waters invented 'lectricity. Vegetable Medley, I'm counting on you to get this one! Do you have any guesses?

7. I mean, if I went 'round, sayin' I was an emperor just because some moistened bint had lobbed a scimitar at me, they'd put me away! From"Monty Python and The Holy Grail", spoken by Michael Palin as a peasant. Correctly answered by E. McPan, Omega (although he referenced the wrong number), TGIC, and ACW. I love this whole scene, but couldn't put it all here without it being very obvious.

8. Well, when I see five weirdos dressed in togas, stabbing a man in the middle of the park in front of a full view of 100 people, I shoot the bastards! That's my policy! From "The Naked Gun" by Lt. Frank Drebin. Correctly answered by E. McPan and TGIC.

9. Hey, no shit it's my ass! I got a big problem down here. Shut it down! Shut it down, now! From "Die Hard", correctly answered by Graculus.

10. Oh, I get it. It's very clever.
Thank you.
How's that working out for you?
What?
Being clever? From "Fight Club", an exchange between "Jack" (played by Edward Norton) and Tyler Durden on an airplane. Correctly answered by Omega and ACW.

11. There's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. It would be a pity to damage yours. From "The Princess Bride", correctly answered by The Rowdy Theologian.

And the "Evil Genius Award" goes to Lulu, who emailed me with 9.5 correct answers (she knew #5 was a MP movie, but not the title). She's a freak.

The "You're No Fun Award" goes to Scarlet for dissing this game as "random, out of context things". This from a woman who rigs her own quizzes with questions from Sweet Valley books. ;-)

Good work, Everyone!

They're probably not very challenging. Leave your answers in the comments. I'll post correct answers and their owners next to the quote.

I'm a Big Quitter

2006-06-19T11:27:00.000-07:00

I'm off the diet. I ended it yesterday afternoon, about a day earlier than I had planned. I just got too sick if it and the way I was feeling. I probably wasn't drinking enough lemonade the last three days. Going to a Father's Day brunch and not being able to eat some of my favorite foods didn't help, either. I ended it in the afternoon with a glass of orange juice, then a couple pieces of fruit. Later I had a banana and snacked on some popcorn Lovely Wife got me. For dinner I had vegetable soup and more fruit, and it was YUMMY! Later in the night I had more popcorn. Probably a little too much. Man, did I miss food! Weight lost: 8 pounds. I weighed in at 178 this morning. Now it's up to me to maintain and lose with good eating and exercise. I'll probably try running on Wednesday morning this week.

Another contributing factor was that I came REALLY close to ending it on Saturday night. The local NBC affiliate decided NOT to show Game 6 of the Stanley Cup Finals and showed a Real Salt Lake MLS game instead! I was so fucking pissed! I left a scathing comment on their website, including anti-Mormon Church rhetoric and the F-bomb (the station is owned by the LDS Church) and I wrote two blog posts about it. My damn computer at home sucks, though, and Internet Explorer crashed both times I wrote the posts, and I was too pissed to do it again. I still can't believe the station did that. Really fucking ridiculous. I watched the game stats update online, and was so mad I just wanted to eat a bunch of bad stuff. They're showing tonight's Game 7 (I should hope so!) and I'll be there to watch it. I think I'm rooting for Carolina, even though I've really enjoyed watching Edmonton this postseason.

Last night LW and I checked out the Da Vinci Code/ Amazing Race rip-off show "Treasure Hunters" on NBC. It's pretty good. The best thing about it, though, was that I had a KICK ASS treasure hunting dream last night because of the show! In it I was in a large group trying to figure out clues and race to cool places. At one point I was ostracized from the group for being snobby and snotty, but then I pled my case to them and everything was cleared up. Later LeBron James (who was apparently on my team) bad mouthed me, so I jumped him from behind, pinned him and shoved his face in the ground while giving him a talking to. I told him that I knew he was going to kick my ass afterward, and that I would feel as defeated and embarrassed as he was with me on top of him, and that maybe after that we could get past things and get along. But then, after we got up, I kicked HIS ass! It was weird! Then I went away, and he came to find me and we made up. After that I remember I got some big clues for my team, but then the damn alarm clock went off. Why can't those dreams start at 1 am and last 6 hours?!?!? Motherfucker!

iPod: "Kitchenware and Candybars" by Stone Temple Pilots, "These Apples (live) by Barenaked Ladies, "M.I.A." by Foo Fighters, "Star" by Belly, and "Man, It's So Loud in Here" by They Might Be Giants.

Friday Kid Blogging

2006-06-16T11:26:00.000-07:00

Not much to talk about, just some cute pics.

Here's CBK Jr. eating a baby biscuit.

Actually, he's sucking it and rubbing the spit/crumb mixture all over his head.

And here are the boys at the pool earlier this week.

Diet progress: Feeling good today. Weight was down an additional pound this morning. Didn't walk last night, but did 140 crunches/leg lifts.

iPod: "Work" and "Firestarter" by Jimmy Eat World.

Couple o' things

2006-06-15T11:32:00.000-07:00

Diet Progress: Weight down about 2.5 pounds from yesterday, 4.5 total. Feeling okay, a bit hungry but it's about time for "lunch". Did 60 pushups last night. I may walk 3 miles with Lovely Wife tonight. I'm thinking that I'll only do this through the weekend. That should be good enough.

Last night was a challenge because I went to a birthday party at Chuck E. Cheese, and was surrounded by pizza. It looked and smelled really good, but by all accounts it didn't taste that good. The cake was pretty bad, too, apparently. All I had was water and by the time we left I was pretty damn hungry. I went almost 4 hours without a drink of lemonade.

Speaking of last night, what a hockey game! I DVRed the game. At about 9, when recording was supposed to stop, I asked Lovely Wife to turn on the TV and see if it went to overtime. Thanks goodness I did. She recorded that, too, but before I could sit down to watch the game, our Canadian neighbor came over and kind of ruined it for me after Edmonton scored. I still watched the whole game, though. Great game, great finish! I'll be very interested to see how NBC does in the ratings on these broadcasts.

Turns out the movie that was being filmed right next to our office building is a major picture starring some real stars. The name of the film is Dark Matter, and stars Val Kilmer and Meryl Streep! I didn't see either of them, though. My boss was trying to leave the building and got stopped in the lobby. They were filming right outside on the sidewalk and wouldn't let him leave. I'll definitely have to see the flick now and see if that footage made it to the final cut.

iPod: "The Shadow" by Tanya Donelly, "Roll the Bones (live)" by Rush, and "Song for the Deaf" by Queens of the Stone Age.

Come out, come out, whoever you are!

2006-06-14T10:25:00.000-07:00

I'm an adult. I can take criticism in the blogosphere (not as well from my wife). If you want to criticize something I'm doing, that's fine. I welcome the free exchange of ideas here. I won't take it personally. So, if you leave a comment that's less than laudatory, please don't do it anonymously. I'm not going to hold anything against you. Plus, I'm going to find out who left it, anyway. ;-)

To answer your concerns: I am SO not a fad diet person. I learned about this from my New-Agey mother in law, who has done it a few times. Like I said, I don't really buy the "cleansing your body of all ills" properties of the diet. I just like to get a little obsessive sometimes to counteract my lack of discipline. I'm all for eating less and getting regular exercise. That's what I was doing before this diet, just not enough to lose more weight. I'm only doing this diet to get to a good base weight before I travel to Florida and get exposed to tons of food paid for by someone else. After that I plan on eating and exercising to maintain my weight below 180, trim the fat, and build some studly muscle. And because Lovely Wife won't be getting pregnant again (and I won't gain sympathy weight with her) I feel I can do it.

As for the healthiness of this diet, maybe it's not so great, but I've done it twice with no adverse effects. I probably should do the salt water flushes to get rid of the gunk in my system, but I can't get the stuff down. It stems from a practical joke my friends played on me in college. While I was away from the table in the dining hall, they saturated my glass of water with salt. I took a big swig and nearly puked. To this day, it's hard for me to drink plain water without it (psychosomatically) tasting a bit salty. Since I'm not concerned with the organic qualities of the diet, maybe I'll just take a pill laxative, or some of that orange Metamucil stuff. Where's Colon Blow when you need it?

Diet Progress: Day 2 of The Diet is one of the toughest. I woke up this morning and was pretty hungry. I've had two cups and am doing pretty well. Weight was down 2 pounds this morning from yesterday. Did 100 crunches last night and that went well.

Lovely Wife and I enjoy NBC's "Last Comic Standing", but the casting for the finalists this year is a total farce. They put in about 5 or 6 unfunny people (and the others aren't really the funniest) just for the personality clashes that will arise from cohabitation. Disgraceful. Lose the premise of finding the funniest person if all you want is catfighting in a house. You can call the show "Catfight" or something.

In conclusion, show yourselves, please. I won't bite.

iPod: "Futures" by Jimmy Eat World, "Death's Alright With Me" by The Dead Milkmen, "The Wild Wild Sea" by Sting, "Mistake" by Athenaeum, "They Might Be Giants" by They Might Be Giants, "All Hail Me" by Veruca Salt, and "The Other Way" by Weezer.

A River Runs Through Me

2006-06-13T14:51:00.000-07:00

When all you ingest is water and lemonade, you sure have to pee a whole bunch! I've been three times already today at work, and I've been holding it in so I don't have to keep making the long walk down the hall so often. The diet is going well so far. On my way into work I walked by a vacant restaurant that was being used by a film crew for catering (They're filming something in the building right next door). There were tables of food spread out, and a catering truck parked next to it. But I strode on by, not tempted at all. The hardest thing so far has been hearing the rustling of my boss' lunch bag at noon. I wasn't hungry, but the Pavlovian stimulus made me eager to eat my own lunch. So I had another cup o' lemonade at 12:30. Yum!

And thanks for your concern about oral yeast infections. While I may not totally buy that this diet cleanses the body of "toxins", I'm convinced that it doesn't harm you at all. I'm looking to do at least 10 days. But I've got a kids birthday party at Chuck E. Cheese on Wednesday and a Father's Day breakfast on Sunday to attend that will certainly test my will power. I'm keeping my fingers, and legs, crossed.

iPod: "Velouria" by Weezer, "Something in the Way" by Nirvana, "Foot Down" by Michael Penn, and "Burden in my Hand" by Soundgarden.

Frustratingly Fun

2006-06-12T15:49:00.000-07:00

When all the blogs are read, the emails checked, and the latest Lost Experience Clue studied, what's a Professional Time Waster to do? The answer, of course, is play Dungeon Escape!

There's no real brain required for this game, but a lot of patience. You either need a quick hand (and a real mouse, not a touchpad), or to memorize patterns. The only way to memorize the patterns, though, is to play it over and over and keep dying. Addictive, repeat playing is built right in.

Enjoy!

iPod: Ironically it's "Maze" by Phish.

175 Here I Come!

2006-06-12T13:33:00.000-07:00

That's the weight I'm trying to reach. So far I've bottomed out at about 184, but my discipline has been lax, to put it mildly. No more! Tonight I'm starting the non-cleansing version of the Lemonade Diet. The non-cleansing part means I'm leaving cayenne pepper out, and won't be drinking laxative tea or salt water. I don't give a shit about the toxins in my system, it's the fat that I want to leave. The diet makes your tongue turn white. I'll have to post a picture of it.

I've done it twice and lost a bunch of weight with it. The first time I also ran a couple times, but that was a big mistake. I'm planning on doing a few push ups or crunches each night this time while on the diet. I hope that doesn't wear me out like the running did.

Lovely Wife and I have abandoned the weight loss contest, but I'd like to reach my goal weight anyway. I could get there without the diet, I'm sure, but not before going to Florida at the end of the month. Also, since I haven't run in over a month, weight loss has been stagnant and this will jumpstart things. I really want to get back to running, and will try to run in Florida. Hopefully my calf issue won't resurface.

It's so great to be able to watch hockey again! On network TV, to boot. The game on Saturday was great, especially when the crowd was chanting "Bullshit!" in unison to protest a no-goal call. Tonight I hope Edmonton evens the series (I'm rooting for a seventh game), but I'll have to miss some of it for the premiere of Hell's Kitchen on Fox. That's what summer is good for, trashy reality TV.

iPod: "Stand" by R.E.M., "Kissy Windmill Print" by Braid, "Mexican Cousin" by Phish, "Still" by Geddy Lee, "Back Porch" by The Presidents of the United States of America, and "Brittle" by Straitjacket Fits.

Friday Kid (and Ugly Tie) Blogging

2006-06-09T11:46:00.000-07:00

The Bear is a great Big Brother, and loves CBK Jr. a lot, but he just can't seem to stop bugging the crap out of the baby. He shoves his face into the baby's face a lot and just pesters him, thinking it's fun. Well, The Bear got some payback on Monday night. We went to a park for an outdoor showing of Tim Burton's Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (which I liked even better the second time I saw it) and The Bear was laying on a blanket. Some people nearby us had kids, and one of their little sons came over to watch the movie with The Bear. He was in his late 2s or early 3s, and was very fascinated with The Bear. He laid down right next to The Bear, blocking his view of the movie. Whenever The Bear tried to move to be able to see, the other kid moved right in front of his face. Then he started touching The Bear's face and playing with his mouth. It was hilarious to us, and The Bear took it pretty well (didn't slug the kid), but it couldn't have been a more perfect lesson for him on how he treats his little brother. In the car ride home we talked about it, and Lovely Wife told him about karma: how the things people do can come back and happen to them, good or bad. After that, The Bear started talking about the "Caramel Monster", who will come and get you if you do bad things. We think he was just being silly and actually understood the point we were making, but who knows. It was pretty damn funny.

Speaking of CBK Jr., he's REALLY close to crawling, which we're very excited about because he's 9 and half months old and hasn't expressed any interest in mobility before last month. Now he's either learning the mechanics of crawling, or working on his pecs.

Anonymous Coworker, inspired by someone else, posted pics of his quite enviable Ugly Tie Collection. I've decided to do the same, with the help of Lovely Wife (who chose my ugliest). All but one of these ties were purchased by me to go with an awkward brown/green suit I have. The blue paisley-ish one probably came from my dad.

(Click for larger, more vividly ugly image.)

Unfortunately, I threw out some truly hideous ones a year or two ago, including a bright green one that inexplicably had what can only be described as profiles of heads with Colonial wigs on them. I wish I had that one right now.

Happy Weekend everyone!

iPod: "Swampland of Desire" by The Dead Milkmen, "Shatter" by Liz Phair, "Photograph" by Weezer, "La Villa Strangiato (live)" by Rush, "Quit" by Hey Mercedes, and "Live in a Hiding Place" by Idlewild.

Weird Coincidence

2006-06-08T15:46:00.000-07:00

Blogger's being quite the obnoxious bitch lately. I meant to post this yesterday.

I was watching The Colbert Report on Tuesday night, and it had a segment called "Stephen's Sound Advice" wherein he gave comical advice to recent college graduates. One of his tips was about not going to Europe to backpack. The advice turned out to be a bitter rant about Stephen's own bad experience in Paris. He talked about reluctantly going to a disco called "Le Palace" and the bad things that ensued from that. When I was in high school, during Sophomore or Junior year, I went to France on a French club trip. We spent a couple days in Paris, and the last night we decided to sneak our under-age asses into a disco... called Le Palace! How do I remember the name? Because I'm the one who called the club from the hotel to confirm that girls got in free, because I knew how to ask it en Francais. Or at least well enough to be understood.

I know that Stephen's story was probably made up, but that makes it all the more coincidental!

I'm a dork, and I have nothing to write about. Sorry.

Now for today's thought. I was thinking about a particular Phish performance I saw on Letterman a while ago, and look what I found on YouTube!

Here's the link if it takes too damn long to load: "Birds of a Feather"

iPod: "Wattershed" by Foo Fighters, "Window Paine" by Smashing Pumpkins, "Cecilia" by Simon and Garfunkel, "Fast Enough for You" by Phish, and "W.M.A." by Pearl Jam.

Who to choose?!?!

2006-06-06T13:47:00.000-07:00

1. I've admired The Oilers for their plucky play, and anyone who beats Detroit deserves adulation.

2. But the Hurricanes have never won The Cup, even in their past life as the Hartford Whalers. Rod Brind'Amour is this year's Dave Andreychuk.

3. But Edmonton's starting goalie is hurt, and their backup is from my alma mater.

4. But Glen Wesley, former Bruin extraordinaire, has a shot to win it, after being beaten by Edmonton before in the finals. A victory by him would be pretty sweet.

I can't choose. I hope it's a great series that goes 7 games.

iPod: "Blind" by Thanks to Gravity and "With or Without You" by U2.

She's Back!

2006-06-05T14:51:00.000-07:00

It's not really news, but I got the go-ahead to link to Lulu's new blog! She took a break and came back with a new site, leaving the old one to grow moldy and fool stalkers. But you get the fresh linkage right here.

Lulu: Chispa

Go to her site and ask her why she hasn't drawn a picture of me. Apparently, she's rather artistic.

As for my weekend, it was relaxing. Didn't do much work because I mowed the lawn last Thursday. Even though there are a lot of things to do in the yard, you're tricked into a sense of landscaping complacency when the lawn looks nice. The Bear had his last soccer game of the year, and even though his team got spanked, he played really well. Now he gets to terrorize Lovely Wife for the summer.

iPod: I'm cleaning up iTunes, and Braid's "Movie Music: Vol. I" is playing on there right now.

Friday Kid Blogging - Graduation!

2006-06-02T13:16:00.000-07:00

The Bear is officially done with Kindergarten today, and he totally kicked ass in it! He's awesome at reading and getting really good at cursive writing! I didn't touch the stuff until third grade in my shabby public school, but his private school starts 'em pretty darn early on it. He's also great at math and learning to tell time. I better stop bragging now.

Not kid related at all: I realized I was slacking in my Fan Boy duties, so I went to the Threadless t-shirt site and downloaded all the songs that Bob Nanna wrote and recorded for the shirts. There are 37 of them. I'm a total geek, but what I've heard so far is great! These will be worth something some day! (won't they?)

The store itself is pretty cool. All their t-shirts are made from public submissions that get voted on. The designs aren't the usual played, smart-alecky/shocking jokes. They're punny, esoteric, and mostly artistic. While I find some designs even more inaccessible than The New Yorker cartoons (which I love), there's some good stuff there. Too bad they sell out of designs really quickly.

Also unrelated to kids, kind of: I had two really weird dreams last night. In one, Lovely Wife traveled overseas to go on a date with someone. She was mad at me because she thought she caught me in a lie when my iPod was mysteriously playing songs over again. She thought it meant I had some device that I used to cover my tracks and hide things from her. I think she hinted in the dream that she had slept with the person. I was devastated. The feeling was very real, and very scary. In the second dream, Lovely Wife took me to a doctor's office to get a vasectomy. Apparently, the doctor was doing them in his office, without anesthesia, right in front of everyone. It was bloody, and the guys were in obvious pain, grimacing and moaning. It seemed I was always the next one up, but I never got in the chair. I asked one guy how it was after he was done, and he said something like it hurt about 3/4 of a full nut shot, but not too bad. WTF?

iPod: "Christmas Card" by Jimmy Eat World, "25" by Veruca Salt, "Drive All Over Town" by Elliott Smith, "Niagara" by Braid, "Slave" by Weezer and "Feather Pluckin" by The Presidents of the United States of America.

That's Curious

2006-06-01T15:23:00.000-07:00

My Mormon boss just left for the day. Early. I looked at the clock as he walked out the door, and it said "4:20."

Hmmmmmmm.......

At least I can stop pretending to work now.

iPod: "A Fond Farewell" by Elliott Smith.

Bully

2006-06-01T14:16:00.000-07:00

I can't think of anything current to write, so I'm going back into the past. It's also an effort to draw my friend Jade out of her cyber silence. I'm not sure if she even reads the site anymore. I don't look too closely at my Sitemeter stats because 90% of my visitors are looking for Jill Wagner. Thanks to that bony, annoying car spokesmodel I have over 30,000 visits to the site. I wish it were 300 visits from people who want to read what I have to say and who play the Brain Squeeze instead, but what are you gonna do?

Anyway, I wasn't a total nerd/outcast growing up, but I was always on the periphery. I was nice, and probably a little meek. Luckily, the only time I was victimized by a bully was in 5th grade. He was a gruff, strong, inarticulate brute by the name of Stephen Thibeau. (I already Googled the name, so save yourself the futile effort of discovering something about my past.) He never beat me up, but he routinely intimidated me. My last name is an easy target for ridicule, and he came up with a really stupid nickname for me that, while it involved my last name, did so in a very non-obvious, non-clever way. It was more the way he said it that was effective. I can't really remember anything specific he did to me, like stealing my things or making me lick the floor, but there are a couple things I remember vividly about him:

1. In elementary school, probably 4th grade, all the kids in the grade released balloons with post cards attached to them. The post card had each child's name and the school's address so that whoever found the balloon could mail the post card back and indicate where the balloon had been found. Mine was never found, but Stephen's was sent back from the furthest location. I resented him for that a bit because I felt a dumb kid like him was unworthy of that honor. You can't expect mature thinking from a 4th grader.

2. He LOVED Michael Jackson. I mean idolized him. He sometimes wore a fedora hat to school like Michael's. He talked about how Michael was the best dancer in the world. His Jacko worship always confused me because he was such a surly bastard otherwise. Seriously, he was. You're all probably thinking that I was such a wimp that I was bullied by the local Michael Jackson impersonator, but really he was a tough, scary kid. Jade, back me up on this, please!

iPod: "Weekapaug Groove (live)" by Phish, "Stratford-on-Guy" by Liz Phair, "Message in a Bottle" by The Police, "Depression Day Dinner" by The Dead Milkmen, "Undone (The Sweater Song)" by Weezer, "Times Like These" by Foo Fighters and "Long Road" by Pearl Jam.

New CBK Drawing

2006-05-31T10:44:00.000-07:00

Juicy A, from The Intersection of 13 and 13 has submitted this masterpiece.

It may not look a whole lot like me, but it certainly portrays more "me" than any of the other submission so far. Click on the image for a larger version.

If you can't read them, the CDs say "CD Trivia Challenge" "Rush" "Jimmy Eat World" and "Hey Mercedes". The book says "Random Trivia". The boys' shirts say "Cutest Baby Ever" and "Soccer Champ". The "35" on my Bruins jersey is Andy Moog's number. I actually have a Moog jersey with the name and numbers on it!

iPod: "Symphony No. 5, 4th Movement" by Dmitri Shostakovich and "Saturday's Alright for Fighting" by Elton John.

Don't Go To Law School

2006-05-30T11:51:00.000-07:00

Unless you have a big trust-fund or rich grandparents to pay the tuition, know that you want to practice tax law, or are guaranteed a six figure income coming out. Otherwise, the debt you incur will ruin your chances of living the life you want to lead.

It's not that I want a BMW, a huge house, and a live-in cook. Okay, I do want those things. But right now all I want is a house with more than 2000 square feet in a decent area. Too bad I need to make about $150K to get that. And this is UTAH! WTF? Why is Utah so damn expensive? Apparently, people move here from other, wealthier states because they actually WANT to! How the hell did that happen? Motherfuckers!

iPod: "Sweetness" by Jimmy Eat World, "Divers" by Braid, and "Conclusion" by The City on Film.

Friday Kid Blogging: ¡La Cucaracha!

2006-05-26T11:47:00.000-07:00

Do You Like 'Lost'?

2006-05-24T12:45:00.000-07:00

Do you also like wasting countless hours in front of your computer at work, ignoring even your usual time-wasting activities?

Then here's a site for you!

The Lost Experience Clues Blog.

"The Lost Experience" is a multimedia game made by the producers of the show that is designed to give background and insight into the mystery of the show. But they don't give such information easily! The blog will help you figure it all out, though.

I'll probably see you all (and my family) sometime next week after I'm through it all.

iPod: "Alive in the Chase" by This Is Me Smiling and "How a Helicopter Sounds" by The City on Film.

Reflections on American Idol

2006-05-23T19:38:00.000-07:00

1. Katharine McPhee pretty much blew it, but that's okay because it's a guy's turn to win.

2. For all the big name guests and celebrities they get in the audience, they sure get the scum-sucking dregs from the songwriting barrel when making the contestants' new singles. Oh. My. Gawd! Those songs were awful!

I guess there's no real telling how America will vote. Kat looks better on an album cover, but Taylor way outperformed her.

And that's all I'll say about that.

Running out of things to say

2006-05-22T12:08:00.000-07:00

Here's another artistic interpretation of me, this time by Lisa the Knitter.

She's actually met me in person, when I had my ill-advised beard.

The Desperate Housewives finale was kind of blah. The only thing I care about is what happened to Mike, and what's the deal with Orson? The Invasion finale was good, and left a big question hanging. Too bad the show probably won't come back to answer it.

I'm eagerly awaiting the 24 finale tonight! Since it's a two-hour episode, I'm guessing they're not just going to send a jet to sink the sub with a missile. Should be good. Last night I had an intense, 24-themed dream where I was Jack and went to a library to thwart some terrorist plan. When I got there, though, the terrorists were much better prepared than I had anticipated, and had a huge advantage. I exchanged fire with several of them for a while. Strangely, I had a machine gun that I was firing, but it wasn't very effective. It was like those rapid-fire BB guns you see at a carnival or amusement park game, where you try to shoot out a star shape from a piece of paper. I had to shoot some bad guy in the face for a long time before he relented. I also had a hand gun that shot normally. The quarters were very close, and I don't know how I escaped unscathed, but I shot a bunch of people and got out. I made my getaway on a bike, and for some reason I had my son with me. He didn't look like The Bear, but he was about that age. I rode away from the library, trying to avoid pursuit, and the last thing I remember was ducking into a convenience store. I think I also had a dream about the Boston Bruins. They were playing well, and Andy Moog was back in goal for them (presumably having come out of retirement). Weird.

Also, the Lost finale this week looks OFF THE HOOK!!!! Can't wait for that.

Kind of like you can't wait for worthwhile reading. ;-)

iPod: I haven't been paying attention. "Anderson Mesa" by Jimmy Eat World is on now.

Friday Kid Blogging

2006-05-19T09:54:00.000-07:00

Sure, your kids may be cute... but are they NEENJA?

Here's CBK Jr. using his neenja skills to scoot his butt across the floor and eat some dog food.

And something neat happened last night. I saw a commercial for the Hummer H3 that I could tell was made in Calgary. I always wonder where car commercials are filmed, and it was cool to recognize the location.

Another random thing, Eagles of Death Metal played Letterman last night, but their drummer, Josh Homme (aka the brains behind Queens of the Stone Age) wasn't playing with them. And I stayed up to see him, too. Bummer.

iPod: Nothing because I wrote this post while on an annoying work call.

Just some stuff

2006-05-18T12:24:00.000-07:00

1. Bye, bye, Elliott Yamin. You're a nice guy with a great voice. Hopefully not winning American Idol will mean good things for your music career.

2. This looks pretty fun, and not entirely blasphemous. Blogging the Bible. There are three entries so far, and you can find links to them on that site.

3. I received two submissions (so far) for the "Draw Me" feature. First is from Scarlet, who was admittedly influenced by JustaGirl's drawing:

Next is from The Girl in Camouflage:

Lisa the Knitter has threatened to do one, and I eagerly await it! Anyone else is encouraged to submit a drawing, as well. It's an always-open invitiation.

iPod: My Emo Shuffle.

News of Note

2006-05-16T13:00:00.000-07:00

1. This weekend I went to a show. The bill consisted of three tribute bands. The first was a tribute to Tool, and they rocked pretty hard. The second was a tribute to Rush, which I will get into in a second, and the third was a tribute to Pink Floyd, whom I've seen before and whose drummer I know. The Floyd band is good, but by the time they got on stage, the place was pretty empty and the vibe of the venue had fizzled.

As for the Rush tribute band, Coldfire, it was weird. You can't make out the members very well in the pictures on that site, but they look nothing like the members of Rush. The band is a four-piece (Rush is a trio) made up of three pudgy, middle-aged guys and a drummer who resembles Rush's legendary drummer, Neil Peart, in a vague way. The singer, who also plays keyboards, sounds a lot like Rush's singer. They were pretty good, especially considering how complex Rush's music is, but it's just surreal to see these guys playing Rush. The only real problem they had was when they played "Mission" from the Hold Your Fire album. Apparently, it was the first time they played it live, and it got pretty messy in the bridge section. The singer also messed up a lyric. So, it was a good time, but not a real "tribute" like this band, who I saw once in college. And that's all the classic rock music geek stuff for today.

2. I tried to record "24" last night, but failed because my stupid VCR was on the wrong channel. We couldn't record it with the DVR because the "Gray's Anatomy" finale was recording, so I had to record it on the antenna TV in the bedroom (Fox comes in the best on that TV). Of course, if Dish Network could just give us a dual-signal receiver for a reasonable price, then we could have recorded both at the same time. The TV is supposed to be on channel 3 all the time, and I change the channel on the VCR to make sure that what I'm watching is what's recorded. Somehow that system got changed. When I popped in the tape, eager to find out what was going to happen to Jack and Company, I got Bill Nye the Fucking Science Guy!

I just found out last night that iTunes sells Fox shows now, so I'll probably buy it instead of getting an illegal torrent download. The problem is, iTunes doesn't have it available yet. I'm probably going to have to buy "Lost" this week, too. Damn two-hour season finales! (In that case it's "The Amazing Race".)

3. Guess who I heard from yesterday, for the first time in a looonnng time. My ex-wife! It's easily been over two years since we last communicated. She emailed me looking for some information so she could fill out a passport application. How's this for a slap in the face: She needed my PLACE AND DATE OF BIRTH AND MY MIDDLE NAME!!!!! The place of birth I can see forgetting, but the other two?!?! I couldn't believe it! Maybe she went to one of those "Eternal Sunshine" memory erasing clinics. I remember her birth date, even year, and middle name. I even remember where her middle name came from. Amazing. Anyway, we traded a couple emails back and forth to superficially catch up. As far as I know, she doesn't know I'm remarried with two children, and I didn't tell her. If she happens across this blog, and reads this post, she'll know who I am and know what I've done with my life romantically. That's fine. I'm not embarrassed about my wife and kids. I don't care if my ex knows or not. I just don't want to tell her in a way that makes it look like I'm rubbing it in. I'd rather she found out some other way.

iPod: No iPod today. Lovely Wife is using it for her walk because I got ripped off in eBay and couldn't get her an iPod of her own. No word on that being resolved yet. Bastards!

Friday Kid Blogging

2006-05-12T13:47:00.000-07:00

Aloha!

Of course I got them matching shirts. In a few years The Bear won't be into it anymore, so I need to take advantage now. He loved that they matched.

In other news, I had a great idea for a Mothers Day gift for Lovely Wife: an iPod Nano for her to use when she walks. I found one at a great "Buy It Now" price on eBay and secretly purchased it. Last night I got an email from eBay saying that the seller's listings had been removed and that I should try to get my money back if I hadn't yet received the item. Motherfucker! I can't believe I got scammed on eBay! I emailed the seller to get their story before I make a claim for reimbursement with PayPal, but I haven't heard anything yet. I don't really expect to, but I still hold out hope that I'll get it. Of course I had to fess up to LW about what I tried to get her and why it she won't have a gift on Sunday. I'm pretty pissed, and embarrassed. What a scumbag!

What do you think I look like?

2006-05-11T13:51:00.000-07:00

You'll have to humor me while I explain my thought process for this post. You may have noticed that when bloggers make their links list for other blogs, they sometimes come up with clever phrases to use instead of the blog names. I'm obviously not one of these creative types, but I've seen the efforts of others with my blog name and I've come to a conclusion: not only is my blog's name weird, but it doesn't easily lend itself to being translated into a catchy or clever phrase. I think my favorite so far was "Lick some salt and beat Nick", which I believe belonged to The Sarcastrix, but if so, she doesn't use it anymore. With that realization I remembered a time in high school when a friend of mine, who is a really good artist, was drawing caricatures of other kids. I asked him to do me, and he looked at me, started to draw, looked at me again, looked at the paper, then looked up and said "I can't!" I have no idea why he felt incapable of drawing me, but ever since I've stayed away from sidewalk caricature artists. I don't know if my features are too bland to be caricature-ized, or if to draw a goofy version of me is so easy it would be offensive. I don't really want to know, so I'll never have it done. I'm genuinely afraid of what the drawing will look like.

That fear will not, however, keep me from inviting strangers to take a shot at it. I know some of you are artistically inclined (TGIC and Lisa the Knitter, I'm looking in your directions) and others like to fool around with MS Paint (Rachel). So I now call on anyone who reads this to sketch what you think I look like. Even if you've met me or have seen a full picture, go ahead and draw me. JustaGirl already did an MS Paint drawing of me after our meeting that was pretty accurate. You can go check that out here for a place to start. Any medium will do: pencil, ink, charcoal, squiggly digital lines, etc. Just get it in jpeg or gif format and email it to me. I can't wait to see what you come up with.* You can show as much or as little of me as you like. The only rule is that you include my face.

* If you think you're funny and you send in a drawing of a pig or an Orc or something, I'll still post it just to show the world how immature you are. Even if that would be a badge of honor for you.

iPod: "God, Give Me Strength" by Elvis Costello (lots of him today), "Union Federal" by Phish (all 25+ minutes of it!), and "Pitseleh" by Elliott Smith.

I got what I deserve.

2006-05-10T11:23:00.000-07:00

Which is a loss in the Blog Fight. Our worthy opponents received one more comment than my team did, so it was close. My tactic of seeking sympathy then scorn didn't work. I probably should have put the second post up earlier for the benefit of my East Coast friends. Oh well.

I'm taking the week off from running because my calf is in rough shape. It must be some kind of inflamed tendon thing, but I don't know for sure. All I know is that it feels okay when I run, but as soon as I stop, it hurts like a bitch and is hard to walk on all day. I played a little scrimmage with The Bear's soccer team yesterday afternoon and was limping afterwards. It better go away after this rest, because it's prime running season, and my weight loss has stagnated. Got to look good for the beach in June.

I know I promised Hawaii pics, but I've just been too lazy to download them onto my work computer. Each pic is between 1.5 and 2 megs, so it's a pain to email or download them, then resize them, and post them. I'll try to get some up this week. I wish I could say that they'll be worth it, but probably not.

Any American Idol fans out there? Who do you think should leave tonight, and who do you think actually will? I think it will be Kat and Elliot (my two favorites) in the bottom two tonight, with Kat leaving. She didn't do as well as the others last night, so it's time to go.

That's all. Just a boring post. Thanks, everybody, for your comments yesterday. And thanks for stopping by the site for the first time ever, Gary!

iPod: "Freeze - Part IV of 'Fear'" by Rush, "Lining Lake Michigan" by Braid, "Exhuming McCarthy" by R.E.M., and "Dead and Bloated" by Stone Temple Pilots.

Please Forgive Me

2006-05-09T13:58:00.000-07:00

I'm afraid you've all been the victims of a hoax. My eye is fine. Well, it's a little stuffy, but otherwise fine. There was no redness, pain, or excessive watering last night. No crying fire. No emergency room visit. If you notice the time of the post, it was just after midnight, EST. It was the post for the Blog Fight, and I thought I'd have a better chance at getting comments if I appealed to the blogosphere's sympathy. I made it all up just to get comments. I want to thank all of you who left comments for your sincere expression of concern. Please accept my humble apology for deceiving you. You should feel free to leave a lot more comments lambasting me for this childish prank. Really let me have it, all of you. You should even comment more than once, under assumed identities, so that I really understand how grievously I have wronged you, my friends. I am scum, and you should let me know that, over and over again.

iPod: "Mona Lisa" by Guster and "Particle Man" by They Might Be Giants.

I'm crying fire!

2006-05-08T21:06:00.000-07:00

I don't know what is going on, but I am in serious pain right now. My right eye is beet red, watering like crazy, and I can barely see out of it. It's been bothering me a bit all day, but then after dinner it got a whole lot worse. I don't think I can get in touch with any of my eye doctors this time of night, so I'm going to the Emergency Room to see what I can do about it. Just need to wait for my mother in law to get here and watch the kids. Wish me luck.

Going Under the Beam

2006-05-08T10:23:00.000-07:00

I got my LASIK eye surgery on Friday, and it went well. The process is uncomfortable in parts, like the back of a Volkswagen, but it doesn't last long. The worst part is the thing that sucks onto your eyeball to make the corneal cut. That and the bright lights shining in your eye while it's propped open and you can't close it. You don't really notice the cutting or laser part at all. Afterwards my vision was better than without glasses or contacts, but a bit iffy. By nighttime it was much better, and over the weekend it was great. Reading and looking at a computer screen is still a bit weird, and makes my eyes tired, but it seems that the procedure was a success.

In other news, I've officially been entered into a Tag Team Comment Fight. The Jinx of Spades, since he's too busy to provide any real blog content, has come up with this idea to see who can get more comments in a day. Here are the rules:

The fight begins at 12:00am EST, May 9th. You have 24 hours to arrange as comments from as many UNIQUE commentors as possible. As always, extra points for painted toes. For round 2, we're going to do something a little special.

TAG TEAM MATCH

The fighters will be set up in groups of two. Each team's comments will be totaled at the end. If someone comments on both teammates, it counts as 2 comments, so remind everyone to visit your teammate's blog as well.

My teammate is k-sra, and our victory depends on you visiting our sites and commenting, preferably on both. Don't let us down. Commenting begins tonight at midnight. I will put up another post tonight for the official Blog Fight comments. I urge all visitors, regulars and first timers, frequent readers and lurkers, to leave a comment. Your participation will be richly rewarded with the joy and satisfaction that you helped me win. What greater prize can there be?

You know what to do.

iTunes shuffle: "Broken Box" by Queens of the Stone Age, "Painting Nebraska" by Braid, "Scent of a Mule" by Phish, "Touch Me Fall" by Indigo Girls, "Time Turned Fragile" by Motion City Soundtrack, and "If Tragedy's Appealing, Then Disaster's an Addiction" by .Moneen.

Friday Kid Blogging: It's Good to be the King

2006-05-05T08:15:00.000-07:00

The Bear kicked major ass in his play yesterday! Here are some pics.

Slumming with a Meme

2006-05-04T14:38:00.000-07:00

You can thank JustaGirl today, because without her meme inspiration I'd be posting about last night's intense "Lost" ending and the virtues of new Three Cheese and Chicken Quesadilla Lean Pockets (mighty tasty!).

So now that you've been spared from that, here's the Random Music Meme:

Put your music player on shuffle. Press forward for each question. Use the song title as the answer to the question. Post on your blog. Comment back if you post it on your site. No comment regarding whatever songs that might come up (although I think I'll make some). Stolen from LOTS of bloggers.

Question 1: Where is your office located?
Answer: "Regrets" by Ben Folds Five. (boring)

Question 2: What happens when you drink too much? (that last song would have been good for this question)
Answer: "Your Stripes" by Buffalo Tom (yawn)

Question 3: What are your feelings about President Bush? (another question the first song would work for, although I didn't vote for the bastard)
Answer: "Good Grief" by Foo Fighters (pretty good)

Question 4: What's your latest blog obsession? (how's a song title supposed to be an interesting answer to that one?)
Answer: "The Angels' Share" by Geddy Lee (lame answer and song)

Question 5: How do you feel about your separation? (huh?)
Answer: "The Infant of Prague Customized My Van" by The Dead Milkmen (???)

Question 6: Name a topical song. (that's not a question)
Answer: "Golden" by Pond (okay, whatever)

Question 7: Give me the obligatory cleavage quote. (again, not a question, and makes little to no sense)
Answer: "Guelah Papyrus" by Phish (how's that for obligatory!)

Question 8: Fantasy Song #1. (do you even know what a "question" is?)
Answer: "Cinderella Man (live)" by Rush (kind of a Cinderella-fantasy connection, I guess)

Question 9: Fantasy Song #2. (I guess you don't)
Answer: "The Old Apartment" by Barenaked Ladies (I got nuthin')

Question 10: Describe your sex life. (back to elementary school with you)
Answer: "Brain of J" by Pearl Jam (gross)

Now I'm going to add a step to the meme and rearrange the answers to go with the best questions:

1. Where is your office located?
A. "The Old Apartment"

2. What happens when you drink too much?
A. "The Infant of Prague Customized My Van"

3. What are your feelings about President Bush?
A. "Brain of J" (as in Jelly)

4. What's your latest blog obsession?
A. "Your Stripes"

5. How do you feel about your separation?
A. "Regrets" (not to be taken literally)

6. Name a topical song.
A. "Guelah Papyrus"

7. Give me the obligatory cleavage quote.
A. "The Angels' Share"

8. Fantasy Song #1.
A. "Cinderella Man (live)"

9. Fantasy Song #2.
A. "Good Grief" (exasperation setting in)

10. Describe your sex life.
A. "Golden"

Okay, it was kind of lame, but it beats trying to stretch something about Lean Pockets.

More iPod: "Release" by Pearl Jam, "Someone Said Your Name" by Thanks To Gravity, "Take a Look" by Liz Phair (for some reason this song was in my head in the shower this morning), and "Stupid" by Toad the Wet Sprocket.

Blogging Just to Blog

2006-05-03T13:17:00.000-07:00

I'm going to try to post daily, like I did once before and then fizzled, in the hopes that I can overcome my blogging despair and maybe squeeze something entertaining or amusing out of my brain. I've still not got much going on in my life, but dag nabbit, I'm going to write anyway!

How about an American Idol rant? In a lot of ways, I think this is the best season of Idol yet. Admittedly, I didn't watch the first season, but I think I can safely say that any season featuring the likes of Justin Guarini, Nikki McKibben, and Ryan Starr isn't going to challenge this season on any quality meters. The main reason I think this season is so much better is the diversity and integrity of the contestants, let alone that the overall quality of talent is higher. The final five all have very good voices, but they are all distinct from each other, and for the most part distinct from what's hot today. My personal favorites are Katharine "Beaver Shot" McPhee (BTW, Kat, thanks for that) and Elliott "Mr. Tumnus" Yamin. They are very talented singers who perform well, but not like record company clones. I think that they are kind of older-skewing, too, and that's probably why I like them, Grumpy-Old-Man-in-Training that I am. This isn't very rant-ish so far, but now I'll get to that part.

Chris "Poseur Extraordinaire" Daughtry. What the hell is this guy doing here? I'll admit that he has pipes, and that maybe he's easy on the eyes for some female viewers, but he irks me for a couple reasons. First of all, Chris, 1999 called and it wants its Whine Rock Sound back. Ed Kowalczyck from Live also called, and he's going to file a copyright suit against you for any money you earn from this Idol thing. Seriously, this guy heard Staind's "Break the Cycle" and, after he put away the lotion and cleaned himself up with some tissue, decided to mimic it and form a band. If you need any proof of his uber-derivativeness, see his "interpretations" of Fuel, RHCP, and Live's version of "Walk the Line" from this season. I'm fine with that, but Buddy, if you didn't get on the train along with Lifehouse, The Calling, Nickelback, Default, and the rest of 'em, it ain't gonna happen. Using American Idol as your Plan B is ill-advised to say the least.

Secondly, you get no cred in the "rock" world without a band. Unless you write the songs and play almost all the instruments (a la Lenny Kravitz [whom I despise, btw]), you're going nowhere. There's a big difference between a solo artist performing with hired guns and a singer in an organic band, and rock fans will totally reject the former. Thirdly, you do realize what's in store for you if you win, right? A prison sentence. You'll be signed to a contract to record an album that will have no trace of your own influence save for your warbly, overdone vibrato. IF you ever get to record on your own terms, it won't be until after several years and at least two albums that will paint you as something THEY want you to be, and not as you would like to be. Look at Kelly Clarkson. By all accounts she's an Idol success story, but it's highly suspect that she is now, 4 years later, making the music she truly wants to.

And fourthly, I just can't abide such an obvious copycat succeeding. Last year it was fun to call Constantine and Bo "rockers" with a wink and your fingers crossed. They were harmless and never really approached my musical "turf". Chris is the first true rock Idol contestant, and his unoriginality is all that more evident to me, a rock fan. If Chris becomes an ambassador of rock and starts a movement away from the popularity of Hip Hop, R&B, Rap, and manufactured Pop, I will be embarrassed to have him be the standard-bearer. Dave Grohl would have to step in and kick his ass.

I heard rumors early on that Fuel actually contacted Chris to take over lead singing duties for their band, but that his commitment to Idol prevents that from happening. I hope for his sake that he gets the boot from Idol and joins Fuel, playing minor league hockey arenas and state fairs for several years to come so that he can support his family. That would be the best possible outcome for him and the rest of rockdom.

iPod: "Ornamental" and "Pipsqueak" by Braid, "Saints and Sailors" by Dashboard Confessional, "Ephemera" by This Is Me Smiling, "What Did You Say?... I'm Sorry, My Eyes Are Burning" by .Moneen., "Table for Glasses" by Jimmy Eat World, "Quit" by Hey Mercedes, "Ten" and "Pain" by Jimmy Eat World, "Secret Santa Cruz" by The City on Film, "The Start to This May Be the End to Another" by .Moneen., "Eleven to Your Seven" and "Every Turn" by Hey Mercedes, and "Anderson Mesa" by Jimmy Eat World.

My nipples could cut glass!

2006-05-02T12:46:00.000-07:00

Man, it's frickin' cold in my office today! It's really hard to type, too, with the cold making my fingers arthritic. They finally fixed the air conditioning in our building, but it's a bit too zealous.

I'm apparently still recovering from the time difference in Hawaii, because I'm exhausted when I get up in the morning. I don't know how I got up to run yesterday. Luckily, my trip didn't damage my standing in the weight loss challenge. I came back about a pound over what I weighed when I left, and by the end of the weekend I was back at my pre-trip weight. I had some very encouraging runs in Hawaii, but now my left calf is hurting more than is should (feels like some kind of tendon-thing) and I don't know what to do about it.

As for the trip, I had a good time. I was there for a convention, which was pretty boring, but I got some good gossip from and about fellow employees and of course the location was beautiful. It's my second time in Hawaii, and for some reason I've never been inspired to partake in nightlife there. Maybe it's the time difference. I know Honolulu is a major city with bars and such open late at night, but I just wanted to stay in my room. I went to one reception at 9:30 pm, and it seemed like midnight. I only stayed for about a half hour, and the walk back to the hotel was quiet, even along the main strip in Waikiki. The other time I was in Hawaii was on the island of Kauai, which is much less happening than Honolulu, but a great place for a vacation. I definitely recommend it.

The rest of my life is going just fine. Lovely Wife is finishing up her first semester back at school, The Bear is doing great in Kindergarten, and CBK Jr. has two cute little teeth sticking up from him bottom gum. No drama or foolishness to report, which I know doesn't make for very interesting reading.

iPod: "Roller Queen" by Jimmy Eat World and "There Are a Million Reasons for Why This May Not Work... And Just One Good One for Why It Will" by .Moneen.

Still trying to catch up.

2006-05-01T14:37:00.000-07:00

My computer is just about dead, so I've been transferring all my stuff over to another one. I'll be back posting, reading, and leaving smart-ass comments probably tomorrow. Hawaii pictures are coming, too. I promise.

Pretty good hockey playoffs so far. Good play, interesting upsets. I almost don't notice the big gaping absence of the Bruins. *sniff*

iPod: "Nothingwrong" by Jimmy Eat World.

I'm back.

2006-04-28T13:00:00.000-07:00

I flew home overnight, and then came back into work, after "saying hello" to Lovely Wife, of course. ;-)

I'm a bit punchy. I'll have lots of pics to post, and apparently I'll soon be in a commenting rumble with a blogger who will kick my ass. In the meantime, 25 points to whoever can guess what the consequences were of eating Cap'n Crunch Crunchberry cereal every morning for a week.

iPod: "Make Out Kids" by Motion City Soundtrack, "That Car Came Out of Nowhere" and "Circus of the Stars" by Braid.

Short Hawaii Update

2006-04-25T23:07:00.000-07:00

Not too much going on here right now. My second day we set up for the convention and I just hung out. Day 3 I checked my manhood at the front desk, rented a scooter with a coworker, and tooled around O'ahu. It was actually very cool, an ideal way to see things you want on your own terms. I'll post pics soon. Until then, here's something I found that I'm sure one blogger I link to will enjoy. And Go Oilers!

Hawaii Day 1 - In Pictures

2006-04-22T20:47:00.000-07:00

My hotel room

Weird built-in radio/alarm clock thingy

Views of boats out my window

Beach out my window

Kind of a lame pool

On the right is the park I ran around

Sunset

The CD Game - The Results

2006-04-22T20:23:00.000-07:00

Sorry for unceremoniously dumping this on a weekend post, but I didn't want to put it off anymore. The best possible base score was 40 points. Here are the results of players who were able to submit an entry:

- In fifth place: Anonymous Coworker with 7 points (no extra credit points).
- In fourth place: Graculus with 7 points (1 extra credit point).
- In third place: Scarlet with 37 points (14 extra credit points).
- In second place: JustaGirl with 37 points (30 extra credit points).
- and the winner is: Rachel, with 38 points!!!

Congratulations, Rachel! You've won the Utah Gift Package, including the delicious salt water taffy. Under the rules of the Game, you must now make your own CD for others to play. I invite anyone who played or who reads this blog to make a CD for a new Game, however, because it was mucho fun and I loved doing it. Just let us know if you'd like to start a game.

Again, congrats, Rachel!

Friday Kid (and Worm) Blogging

2006-04-21T22:04:00.000-07:00

So I'm in Hawaii. I'll be here a week, and I'm looking forward to it, but I don't think I'll be able to do anything really exciting. I'm going to try to hike up to the top of Diamond Head Crater at the end of Waikiki, and I'm fantasizing about finding and raiding the "Lost" set in the hopes of being a walk-on Other extra, but that probably won't happen. Anyway, here's some pics of CBK Jr.

And now, for no good reason other than I don't know how else to post these, here are some gross worms that crawled up on our patio last weekend after it rained all night. Enjoy.

The CD Game - The Answers (FINALLY!)

2006-04-20T13:05:00.000-07:00

Well, I've received either a tracklist or confirmation of withdrawal from everyone, so I can now reveal the track names and artists for those of you anxious to find out how you did, or just anxious to know what you've been listening to.

1.
"The Frowning of a Lifetime" by Hey Mercedes.

2.
"Tokyo Storm Warning" by Elvis Costello and the Attractions (Elvis Costello also acceptable).

3.
"We Gotta Be Clean" by Guster (couple other titles also acceptable). Cover of a Sesame Street song originally done by Bert.

4.
"Are We Really Happy With Who We Are Right Now?" by .Moneen.

5.
"Some Song" by Elliott Smith.

6.
"The Most Beautiful Things" by Jimmy Eat World.

7.
"Linus & Lucy" arranged for guitar and performed by Andrew York. Composed by Vince Guaraldi and featured in numerous Peanuts cartoon specials.

8.
"Scoliosis" by Pond.

9.
"Baby's Arm" by Belly.

10.
"What a Wonderful Puddle" by Braid.

11.
"Hey, Mr. DJ, I Thought You Said We Had a Deal" by They Might Be Giants.

12.
"Fearless" by Pink Floyd.

13.
"Drive Me Wild" by Foo Fighters. Cover of a song by Prince (no one got that extra credit bit).

14.
"Velouria" by Weezer. Cover of a song by The Pixies.

15.
"Annihilate Now" by Idlewild.

16.
"Llama" by Phish.

17.
"Hawthorne" by that dog.

18.
"For Holly" by The City on Film. Tracks 1, 10, and 18 are all by bands featuring Bob Nanna. He wrote and sang all of them.

19.
"Scorpio Come" by Thanks to Gravity.

20.
"Reason to Believe" by Michael Penn and Aimee Mann. Cover of a song by Bruce Springsteen.

Results coming soon! Stay tuned.

Operation Meeta Blogger: Vancouver

2006-04-19T15:17:00.000-07:00

I know I've been pretty absent lately. I've been traveling, and busy preparing for another, much longer business trip. I'm actually going to Hawaii for a conference, for about a week. Meanwhile, Lovely Wife will be at home, writing a paper and taking a final exam. I'm scum, I know. We wanted to make it a trip for two, but it just wasn't going to work out.

Anyway, earlier this week I went to Beautiful Vancouver, British Columbia for work and met up with Just a Girl, the fifth Canadian Blogging Woman I've met so far. The meeting went very well, with lots of conversation about music, Canada, hockey, family, etc. It got off to a bit of a weird start, thanks to me. I was supposed to meet her in the lobby of my hotel, but as my colleague who was joining me on the trip was on his way to the hotel from the airport, and I didn't want to run into him and explain that I was meeting someone I met through blogging. This guy is one of the partner owners of my company, and just thought that I didn't want to confess my blogging habit to him, so I hid upstairs in the lounge where I could keep a lookout for both the partner and Just a Girl. Luckily, I saw her first from the balcony overhead and asked her to come upstairs. We hung out there for a while until the coast was clear, and then went looking for dinner. It was a very nice night in Van City (as some people call it, apparently) and we had a nice walk until we found a pasta restaurant for dinner. I, of course, ran my mouth of with lots of personal questions and self-aggrandizing comments. She graciously answered my questions and mercifully laughed at my jokes. So it was a very good time, and even though she doesn't actually live IN Vancouver, I'll definitely try to meet up with her when I travel there again.

One of the best parts of meeting her, though, is that she can verify who we saw strolling the streets of Vancouver. I was able to snap a picture of him with my phone after he walked by us.

It's Emmanuel Lewis, TV's Webster! I swear to God! I have no idea what he's doing in Vancouver, but it was definitely him

Friday Kid Blogging

2006-04-14T12:30:00.000-07:00

The Bear is a soccer superstar. Here's the photographic proof:

Carrying the ball upfield.

Corner kick.

Breaking away from the pack.

Another corner.

Scoring on a breakaway!

On that play, he actually chased down a player on the other team who was breaking away, stopped the shot in front of his own goal, and then brought the ball down the field by himself and scored.

Of course, he's a good sport

On top of all that, he's also a kick-ass big brother!

UPDATE: I almost forgot! The Bear is going to be in a play at his school, and he was given the role of King of Seasons, with three times more lines than all the kids in his class. Total Rockstar!

iPod: "Broken Box" by Queens of the Stone Age, "Aftermath" by Phish, "Pink Triangle" by Weezer, "No One Knows' by Queens of the Stone Age,"Homeward Bound (live)" by Simon and Garfunkel, and "The Mayor of Simpleton" by The City on Film.

Sometimes stupid email forwards are a blessing

2006-04-13T12:40:00.000-07:00

Because if I hadn't received the one quoted below, I wouldn't have had anything to say today.

I PLEDGE ALLEGIANCE TO THE FLAG, OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA, AND TO
THE REPUBLIC, FOR WHICH IT STANDS, ONE NATION UNDER GOD, INDIVISIBLE, WITH
LIBERTY AND JUSTICE FOR ALL!

I was asked to send this on if I agree or delete if I don't. It is said
that86% of Americans believe in God. Therefore I have a very hard time
understanding why there is such a problem in having "In God! We Trust" on our
money and having "God" in the Pledge of Allegiance. Why don't we just tell the
14% to Shut Up and BE QUIET!!!

If you agree, pass this on, if not delete.

I AGREE !!!!

1. If you agree that the dipshit who started this email is a retard, leave a comment.

2. If you agree that the fuckwad who started this email didn't realize that the 86% includes Jews and Muslims, leave a comment.

3. If you agree that the scrotal tool that started this email, upon being informed of #2, would rather use a lower percentage number that represents only Christians, leave a comment.

4. If you agree that the anus-licking douche bag who started this email, and all those who agree with it, are incapable of understanding the distinction between having the words in the pledge, and a school requiring students to say them, leave a comment.

And finally,
5. If you agree that Lost was only "pretty good" last night, leave a comment.

I AGREE!!!!!

Duty Calls

2006-04-11T12:10:00.000-07:00

I'm listening to the new .Moneen. album that comes out today on AOL music, and so far it's much more indulgent and self-serious than anything else they've done. And that's not a good thing. Of course, indie critics are stroking themselves over it.

Sigh, I'm still going to go buy the CD, though. Gotta remain loyal and give it a fair chance. Plus it gets me out of the office.

Guest Blogger Today

2006-04-11T10:56:00.000-07:00

I've got nothin', so I'm calling in reinforcements. Take it away, CBK Jr.!

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Thanks, my boy! Great job. Now, for your reward, I'll let Grandma spoil you.

iPod: "Episode IV" by Jimmy Eat World, "Save a Life" by Hey Mercedes, "I Remember California" by R.E.M., and "Grinned" by Pond.

P.S.1 - His hair is tenting in the first two pictures. He's not a Conehead.

P.S.2 - I actually bothered to run Spell Check on this post.

Announcing a new blog link!

2006-04-07T13:53:00.000-07:00

Some of you regulars may know that I enjoy the rare luxury of a good, friendly relationship with an ex-girlfriend. It's a long-distance friendship, so thankfully I can't do too much to ruin it. We've been keeping in touch for several years, and this blog has brought us even closer (because she plays the Brain Squeeze every day). She now has her own fledgling blog that you should all check out. She's a librarian by trade, but a writer by nature, and living happily in Maine after some pretty trying years. Here's the link:

Hyperbolic Hermitage

Enjoy!

iPod: "Blister" and "Pain" by Jimmy Eat World, "I'm Afraid of Everything" by Braid, and "Wrath of the Donkey Remix" by .Moneen.

Friday Kid Blogging

2006-04-07T13:35:00.000-07:00

I don't have any stories this week, but me and the boys were playing with the new FujiFilm FinePix F10 digital camera last night. Here are the results:

Oh, Canada!

2006-04-07T11:16:00.000-07:00

You slow-moving, bureaucratic land!

Well, two of the Canadian CD Game contestants have finally received their CDs! I'm still waiting for one to receive hers, and there's a player who got hers, but has been too busy to open it. I'm sure the suspense about the contest, as well as the track information, is getting to some people, so I don't want this to drag out too long. So hopefully the Calgary CD will arrive soon, and the Californian will open her envelope or drop out of the contest.*

* There's no shame in withdrawing, Lulu. Four people have already had to because of time constraints. This Game is about the music. As long as you love everything on the CD, you're a winner. ;-)

Real Beautiful Women - Virginia Edition

2006-04-06T14:02:00.000-07:00

Like a Phoenix from the ashes, it rises again!

Real Cutie

1

2

Real Hottie

1

2

Real Pretty

1

2

Mope

2006-04-06T09:53:00.000-07:00

Here I was, wallowing in self-pity over:

1. weather being crappy;
2. scoring poorly on all three trivia quizzes I played; and
3. having to go to the dentist later today to get a filling between two teeth (which means much drilling).

And then I find out that Bob Nanna of The City on Film is going to start chemotherapy. I think he has lymphoma. Great!

On the one hand, fuck my small little problems! I'm embarrassed for even feeling sad about that crap.

On the other hand, now I'm even more depressed. I don't mean to make it about me, it's just bad news. I wish Bob all the luck, determination, and positive energy he needs to get better.

I'm going to post the Virginia Edition of Real Beautiful Women later and probably just shut down and mope for the rest of the day.

Here's a visual aid my wife took with our great new Fujifilm FinePix F10 digital camera! We've had some fine spring weather, and then this slushy crap comes down most of the day. Blah!

iPod: Some Braid and Hey Mercedes songs written by Bob Nanna.

Aaarrrrgghhhh!!!

2006-04-05T22:31:00.000-07:00

"Lost" went all "Fight Club" and "Identity" tonight and it's messing with my head! What the hell are they doing?!?!? It can't be what they introduced in tonight's episode. It just can't be!!!

Better safe than sorry

2006-04-05T09:40:00.000-07:00

I don't want to miss my hair appointment again, so I'm getting this out of the way now:

1. Katie Couric going to CBS. Who the hell cares? Damn, she's annoying!

2. My wife bathed CBK Jr. this morning while she took a shower, so I had to get him out, dry him off, and get him dressed. I put his lotion on before the clothes, and my hands smell like my baby boy. I keep sniffing my hands and it makes me happy.

3. I'm effing hungry! But I was down another pound this morning. Must maintain discipline!

iPod: "Garner Hall Music Room" and "You're Lucky to Be Alive" by Braid.

For all you trivia junkies

2006-04-04T12:12:00.000-07:00

Rachel over at Blarg has started a new quiz: The Blarg Boggler. She says it's this week only, but I think we should convince her to make it permanent.

Apparently it's very gyno-friendly. Of the seven people who've played, I'm the only man on the scoreboard, and I got 7th and 6th place (I played twice). The only woman I beat was wrestling a child during her quiz, so after handicapping her performance, I came in last. Twice.

Go check it out, and see if you can beat Rachel's amazing score of all 10 right in 54 seconds!

A Warning Sign

2006-04-04T11:46:00.000-07:00

It's no secret that blogging has disrupted my professional life and productivity, but now it's interfering with my regular life! How'd that happen? Today I missed a hair appointment and last week I missed an eye appointment, just sitting at my desk, doing nothing. I just plum forgot about them. In my (weak) defense, I was the only one in my office today at the time of my appointment, which was noon. So I was hungry and eager to eat my lunch, and also subconsciously felt that I shouldn't leave the office unattended. Then at 12:45 I finally remembered. In blogging's defense, I wasn't actually blogging when I forgot about the appointment today. I was doing trivia quizzes and then IMing with a friend. I finished reading blogs much earlier in the day. Jesus, what a lazy ass I am! At least I ran again yesterday afternoon, and this morning I was rewarded for it with one less pound on my weight.

On a very tangentially-related note (because I mentioned the eye appointment above), I'm back to having four eyes instead of two. I'm getting Lasik eye surgery, and I need to keep contacts out of my eyes for two full weeks before my pre-surgical exam. So I dusted off the old specs and got new lenses put in them. I hadn't updated my glasses' prescription ever, I don't think. I got them around 1998 and before the new lenses they were about as helpful as if I held a piece of wax paper over my face. But now I can see with them, and I'm getting used to the sensation of wearing them. I've run with them on twice, and that worked out okay, but I'll be glad after the surgery when I'm glasses and contact free. That's when living will REALLY begin for me.

Yeah, right. But I'll be happy for the convenience, and my wife will be happy that if something goes bump in the night, I won't be fumbling with glasses or contacts before I can bravely protect my family.

ipod: Guster shuffle.

How Apropos

2006-04-03T08:34:00.000-07:00

How's this for an appropriate metaphor for my blog lately?

Yep, that's a tumbleweed. It's a gen-u-wine round, sun-bleached, thorny bush and I found it in our yard this weekend. It must have blown over the fence a couple weeks ago during one of our high-wind weekends. Perhaps that's how the large, white dog crap got in, too. We have two chihuahuas who shit much smaller and darker than that. I can't think of how it got in, because it seems very unlikely that some large dog with Hepatitis jumped our fence, took a dump, and then jumped back out. The fence is about 4 feet high. Very weird.

The brown stuff on the lawn is peat moss (genuine Canadian Sphagnum, whatever that means). We seeded the many, many bare spots on the lawn this weekend in hopes of restoring some sense of lushness to our pitiful back yard. Fingers crossed.

Did you happen to notice the vibrant colors in the photos, though? That's because I took the pictures with our fabulous new digital camera! We had been taking pictures with our Sony mini-DV camcorder, and weren't pleased with the quality of the pics. We found out recently that the digital camera part only had 1 megapixel. So we got a Fuji Finepix F10, for super cheap at Sam's Club, and it's great so far. It has 6.3 Megapixels, and lots of cool shooting features. So expect higher quality Kid Blogging pictures soon!

As for The CD Game, there's not much to report. Two people only had time to submit partial lists, two dropped out completely due to lack of time [planning a 1 year-old's birthday party? That was a pretty weak one ;-)], and the three Canadians haven't even received their CDs yet. I've got two full submissions, one of which is Lovely Wife's, and she's not eligible to win. Don't feel bad for her, though, because she's been eating the extra taffy with me. I'd like to say that the people who haven't completed their lists can have more time, but 1) that's not really fair to the Canadians, and 2) they probably don't really care enough to use that time.

Finally got in a weekend run yesterday, 4.5 miles. It felt good to do, but I'm tired and a bit sore today. I'm looking forward to increasing my distance again. I also got on the scale today and didn't lose any weight from last week's weigh-in. Damn!

iPod: "Long Slow Goodbye" by Queens of the Stone Age, "All the Wrong Notes" by The City on Film, "Alpha Beta Parking Lot" by Cake, "New Kid on the Block" by Barenaked Ladies, "Kitchenware & Candybars" by Stone Temple Pilots, "Ten" by Jimmy Eat World, and "Tales of a Scorched Earth" by Smashing Pumpkins.

Crap!

2006-03-31T14:45:00.000-08:00

I guess ambiguities always come up when dealing with rules. In the initial CD Game post I had this rule:

3. I encourage you to include as much information about the track as you want, or can find. Extra credit may come into play to break a tie. Whatever you want to include will be welcome, but don't knock yourselves out too much. I don't need the name of the assistant engineer from the recording session.

That passage implies that extra credit info will be considered when breaking a tie. Since receiving some game submissions, however, I've been scoring with extra credit on a track-by-track basis, including it in the total score. This could lead to someone who missed some vital track or artist info getting a higher score than someone who got everything right but who didn't include any extra credit info.

Seeing as I added the concept of Extra Credit to the game because I was hoping to benefit from Extra Credit in the last round hosted by Graculus, where I was sure there was going to be a tie, Extra Credit will only break a tie between people who have the same base score based on their answers for title and artist.

I hope this doesn't cause any problems, but it seems the most consistent and fair way to do it.